Peppermint; Draco Malfoy [2]

TWENTY-SIX

DRACO'S P.O.V.

I watch Alexis walk away, her blonde curls bouncing as she makes her way to the classroom. We were so absorbed in each other that we didn't even notice the people coming in and out of the classroom, all of them discussing the test and how it went. When she left, we were practically the only ones left.

Hearing her laugh so freely was a delight. It was like music to my ears. And my ears only. Nott doesn't make her laugh like that. He never has.

Talking to her again like that reminded me of when we were first years and she'd try so hard to be nice and talk to me. I'd push her away every time because I didn't think someone like her would ever like someone like me, but she was so persistent.

When we finally became friends, I realised how genuine she was. She had no idea who I was and she loved to hear me talk about my family and my home life – well, the good there was to tell. Being with her was so easy. I even told her about some of the bad things too. She always understood and she never judged. Yet I couldn't return the favour.

I wish I never knew about her. I wish I could change how things turned out. I wish my father thought differently. The worst part is, I do. I don't care who or what she is. Muggle-born, half-blood, pure blood. Makes no difference to me. But it does to him. Which means it has to make a difference to me too.

My father means a lot to me. I could never disappoint him. But my mother means just as much to me too. And I know she thinks like me sometimes.

The past few years have been... hard. A lot of bad. Especially last summer. I wanted nothing more than to write to Alexis. Read her swirly handwriting on a piece of parchment, smell the light scent of roses that rubbed off from her perfume. And most of all, be understood. Because I know with her I am. She'd know what to say, what to tell me. She'd be there for me. No one else is.

Nott is the same. His father works with mine. They're both in it. Death Eaters. I learnt that ages ago but never knew what they were actually called until recently. We've been friends since birth because of it, just like Crabbe and Goyle, and they're my best mates, but they're not her.

She was my best friend too. And I never got to tell her that. And now Theo and Alexis are together. It's been hard seeing them. Holding hands... hugging... kissing. It disgusts me. He knew nothing about her. He didn't know her favourite food or her favourite colour. I had to tell him everything.

I don't even know why he asked her out because he could never tell his father about her. He'd never be able to show her off how she should be. Our parents could never know.

She doesn't deserve it. She doesn't deserve any of us. We would never be able to treat her properly. Not even Quinton. His parents are Death Eaters too. They knew all our parents when they used to live here but they left sometime around when Quinton was born. I don't know why they came back but it's probably got something to do with whatever my father has been doing.

I knew from early on I liked Alexis but it didn't hit me until I broke things off with her. It was harder than expected, not because my father ordered me to do it, but because it was the first time I had thought of not listening to him. I didn't want to. I hated the thought of letting her go again. And ever since I've been trying to get her back.

Why? I don't know. Nothing has changed since then. But I need her. More than ever. The thought of going back home for the summer is horrifying. I can't go back there, alone. My throat hurts every time I think about it. No one knows what I endure, what goes on when the doors are closed. The pain. The single person I've ever even considered telling is Alexis.