TASTE OF EXILE; minchan

❯ 𝚜𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚗

𝙈𝙄𝙉𝙃𝙊

he saw something through me, something i don't even know.

how..... infuriating.

the moment he had stopped my blade, it was a shock to me that someone else was close to my ability and skills, or maybe even surpasses me. no matter how smart i am, or no matter how skilled i am to live on my own, i cannot live by myself.

if i were to be left in my own hands, my life would've ended long ago. but this secret of mine..... it keeps me alive, i can't die yet without finding justice to why they had created me to destroy this society.

be it the reason for me to stay, but chan might be the only one who can kill me and end my suffering. he is the one i will only choose. he is a good man, he has good principles, and thinks of others more than himself. his soul is pure, opposite of mine- he is worth thousands of me.

chan had reminded me of someone i knew once, someone who had once trusted me but died by my hands, along with the rest of the people he cared about. i had destroyed all he had, and i had destroyed him too.

i glanced at my hands, and i could only see blood through my vision, and the last words of those people i had killed. i had no hope after all, no apology can repay my sins.

i stopped to see that chan was looking back at me and staring, i blinked a few times and our eyes locked. he smiled at me and i felt my heart skip a beat, i cannot remember a time someone had given me genuine kindness. i somewhat started to feel attached to him, no, it wasn't me, it was what is left of my soul. i could feel it grasping for his, craving his presence so desperately that i feel like i could die when he's out of my reach.

this is starting to become an obsession.

that's when i decided. i will stay by his side, always, for as long as he would let me.

whatever is left of humanity within me, is desperate for him to give me salvation, make me prove my worth for this life.

or maybe i'm doing this to redeem myself, from what had happened six years ago. six years ago where i opened my eyes to the world who saw me as nothing but a villain whose soul reeks of sin.

no matter how much i regret now, nothing can bring back the life of that person who i want to apologize the most to.

we had escaped the chase half an hour ago and we were back in the city, walking around and blending in with the civilians.
❝ walking around with burned and ripped clothes is embarrassing. ❞
chan giggled and i stopped walking, i looked around and perked up when i saw a men's clothing shop around the corner.
❝ yeah i see where you're looking but we left all our money back in the room and it's not like we can get things for free. ❞
he sighed and i smiled.
❝ everything is free if you just run fast enough. ❞