space cadet | lil peep

4| "you're just high"

gus

i let jj through the front door. i could see her eyes wandering across the rooms, taking in her surroundings. "my rooms upstairs" i told her. "no shit" she said. she followed me up the stairs, waiting for my direction of where to go. i opened the door for my room, "sorry it's a mess. i didn't expect company" i apologized.

"i don't care. i really don't get why people feel the need to clean excessively or apologize if something is messy. like you live here? you do things? obviously it's never gonna be constantly pristine?" she said. "that's actually not a bad way to look at it. you're quite right" i told her, she had a point. "i know. i'm never wrong" she said.

"i admire your confidence" i told her. "good" she said, looking down and picking at her nails. "well, shall we?" i asked her, pulling out my grinder and rolling papers. "we shall" she smiled. jj watched me intently as i rolled her a joint. she could have her own, i didn't mind sharing once in a while.

"whatcha looking at?" i asked her. "you" she said. "why?" i asked, she hadn't taken her gaze off of me. "i don't know. you're focused, it's kinda cute. i can appreciate a man who can roll" she told me. was that a compliment? she didn't seem like the type to be handing those out freely.

"well thanks, i guess?" i said. "it's a compliment, you can smile or some shit" she rolled her eyes at me. i did smile a little at her validation, she thought i was cute? "here" i said, handing it to her. she put the end of it in her mouth, "light?" she asked. she leaned forward to i could hold the flame over the end not in her mouth.

she took a tiny inhale, i could tell she was holding in a cough. "you can cough, it's fine" i said, getting to work on rolling my own. "nah, i'm not a lil bitch" she said, her voice straining so she sounded like a 70 year old man. i laughed a little at her.

"what is this?" she asked, "uh, weed?" i said, is that not obvious? "no like, strain" she clarified. "oh. bruce banner. it's good shit" i informed her. "nice. haven't heard of that one before" she shrugged.

she sat awkwardly on the edge of my bed, i was sitting in my rolling desk chair. "you can sit in the corner of the bed or like, on the other chair or something more comfortable than that" i told her, pointing out her awkward position. "oh okay" she said, sliding back into the corner of the bed against the wall. "mind if i join ya?" i asked. she shook her head at me so i sat next to her on the bed, a few feet away.

"your parents let you smoke in the house?" she asked, sounding a little surprised. "well no, i just do it anyways. damage is done once you do it once so whatever" i shrugged. i tried to keep the window open at least. "looks like we got a real rebel on our hands" she joked.

the weed was probably kicking in, i could tell she was relaxing a little and being more chatty without being super bitchy. it was quite pleasant actually. "so you said you moved here, where did you live before?" i asked. "albuquerque" she said. "i've never met someone from albuquerque, isn't that where they filmed high school musical?" i asked. she giggled a little. "well technically yes it was. i didn't realize that was people's association with it" she said. "well, maybe just mine" i laughed.

"you're cool jj" i told her. "thanks. i know. you're not too bad either. and i don't really like people, and most people don't really like me either" she sighed. "you can come off a little harsh" i informed her. "i know. i just know who the fuck i am and what the fuck i want. like let's just get straight to the point people waste so much time on bullshit nowadays. i don't sugar coat shit, why wouldn't people just want to know things straight up?" she explained, sort of, why she was the way she is.

"you know what you want, i kind of like that" i told her. "good. i do think you're pretty okay gus. even if i seem like a bitch, i like ya" she said. "good to know" i nodded. "i think this is also just taking my edge off a little" she laughed, waving the half smoked joint around in the air.

"i've known you for like, a day, and this is like the closest thing to a real friend i've had" she said, laying back on the bed so she was facing the ceiling. "you're just high" i told her. "no i'm being serious" she said. "i doubt that's true" i said.

we both just chilled in silence, smoking the rest of the joints away. we didn't need to talk all the time, i found her company enjoyable even in silence. "i should probably getting going home" she told me, placing the roach in the ashtray. "you gonna make it back okay? i can walk your i offered. "uh" she said, trying to stand up but stumbling a little.

"yeah maybe that would be good" she said. "yeah no worries" i said, helping her stand up and steady herself. "that is good shit" she told me. "i know" i said, mocking her favourite phrase a little. i kept a hand on her back while she went down the stairs to make sure she didn't fall. i was high most of the time so i was pretty well functioning as usual.

we got outside into the fresh air and got to the end of the road and the regular jj seemed to make an appearance again. "i'm good now. i can walk by myself" she said, taking herself out of my grasp and strutting forward. "you want me to just go home?" i asked. "no you can still come. i'm just capable of walking on my own thanks"

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chapter question
what's ur fav kind of bread i like sourdough