The sad crow

The sad crow-Chapter 16

Trigger warning: Self-harm, depression, suicidal thoughts, suicide attempt, mental disorders, abuse

We shortly arrived at the ramen shop after a 20 min walk. We all sat down at a big table and everyone ordered their food, "What do you wanna eat Shoyo?" asked Kageyama in a whispering tone, I hesitated with my answer "I'm sorry Tobio but I think I'll just have water.." Everyone ordered and the food arrived not too long after, we all just talked in the meantime, it was fun but I could feel how everyone was watching my behavior like they were stalking me. The food didn't look too bad but I was happy having my water. One thing that I really couldn't keep my eyes off tho was Tsuki and how quiet he was, the atmosphere was good but I just had enough "Uhm Tsukishima? Are you alright? You aren't talking and I wondered if it was because I did something..?". Everybody moved their eyes onto me and the blond-haired boy, I guess the whole team was already waiting for his answer that was soon to come "..Funny that you say it like that, actually Yamaguchi told me to not say anything but I can't stand it anymore, it's annoying, you are, I mean yeah the stuff with your dad was shit but come on, all this attention for what? It's not that hard! We all have problems! I don't intend to offend you but don't you think you are just a bit of an attention seeker?".

I was shocked. I couldn't get a single word out.

Suddenly, a loud bang, Kageyama hit both his hand on the table and stood up "OI SALTYSHIMA WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG IN YOUR HEAD??!"Tobio was full was rage, "YOU KNOW NOTHING YOU SON OF A BITCH SO SHUT UP WILL YA?!"

Apart from Kageyama's screaming it was silent, my other friends were just as shocked as I was. What is happening?

Wet.

My face was starting to feel wet. Am I crying? I think I'm crying,

Sugawara jumped in "hey hey hey let's all calm down! Hinata are you ok?"

Yamaguchi straight up slapped Tsukishima and Kageyama hugged me but I was far gone, my mind full of thoughts about what Tsuki said. Am I an attention seeker??? Was I overreacting this whole time? Was what dad did alright and I just fucked up somehow?

Tears and more tears rolled down my pale face, I wanted to throw up, I hate my life, I hate myself. I stood up in instinct and ran out the door, everyone trying to stop me but nothing holding me back. I run and run and run. It was already dark outside, my brain blank as a white piece of paper but still full of all these voices. I could hear and feel how Kageyama, Noya, and Tanaka ran after me, the others screaming my name from afar.

I wanna go home. I wanna go home. I wanna go home.

Mommy, please save me.

(A little note, this story will come to an end sometime and I intend to do 2 different endings, one good one and a bad one, tho that still has time, I don't actually know how long I will write this story but probably it'll not end too soon since I have fun writing it hehe! Thanks for reading to this point btw! Have a nice day! :3)