Trigger warning: Self-harm, depression, suicidal thoughts, suicide attempt, mental dissorders, abuse
Did I really just let them lay there? I must have forgotten to put them away. All my memories of the day stared to pop up in my head, the thing with Kageyama and the training and all my depressed thoughts. I rememberd how dad hit me and how I felt the pain in my whole body. I rememberd how I miss mom and Natsu.. It was really my fault that their gone.. But than a flash of a special memorie hit me! I was cutting! And I felt so happy about that, it was the best feeling I had since a long time. I want it again! And again! And again! More!
It was like without any other thinking about something I already held the blade in my hand. The best feeling, the happiness I wanted to feel rushed through my body. One, two, three, four, DING DING DING! I was so shocked from the door ringing that I cut to deep! FUCK FUCK FUCK! What do I do?? It bleeds more than usual.. I looked at the clock and realiesed that I should have met with Kenma and the others 1hour ago. Did I really took that long? Are they here? This is worst timing ever..
DING DING DING KNOCK KNOCK! "Hinata? Are you ok? You didnt come and you weren't answer my texts?" I heard Kenma saying in a louder voice. "Yeah! I'm good! I'm coming!" I screamed. I didn't have time to think about what to do with the bleeding and just put some bandages around them and wore a hoodie. I went downstairs and opend the door to see Kenma, Kuroo, Lev and.. Kageyama? What is he doing here? "Ah.. Sorry.. Come in!" I shyly said to my friends. "Finally! What took you so long tangerine?" Kuroo said as they all started to walk in. "Yeah we were worried little guy! We even asked Kageyama if he knew where you're at!" Lev said with a little worried voice. Hmm I guess that's why he is here. He was probably worried and came along. "You okay Hinata?" The black haired setter asked while looking into my eyes. "Oh.. Yes I'm fine." I quickly responded. "Lets all go the living room! I'll go get some drinks from the kitchen.". Everybody nodded at my word and went to the living room to sit on the big sofa. I made my way to the fridge while hoping that something was in there. Since I don't eat or drink that much I never really go shopping for stuff. I opend it and.. There was some juice! But whats that? ... Blood? On.. My sleeve? But I put bandages around it? Is that one cut really that deep? Come to think of it.. It really does hurt a lot and I.. feel a little dizzy..
(Thank you for reading this short chapter :D I just wanted to say some stuff to you guys! If you struggle right now.. please talk to somebody and never lose hope! I know it can get hard and maybe you don't even see a reason to live right now.. But please trust me! It will get better! I promise! But keeping it all to yourself wont help so please talk to someone you trust! If you ever want to talk to me feel free to send me a message! I will answer as soon as I see it! I cheer for you guys! <3 See you in the next chapter!)
Some more Kagehina moments are gonna come soon<3
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The sad crow
FanfictionHinata Shoyo was always happy and smiled. Until he began to change.. He looked so sad.. !TRIGGER WARNING!
