Carnal Desire "The Awakening"

Chapter Seven

Wednesday, September 2nd

JORDAN

I realize I seem like an asshole for leaving Sydney on edge the way I did. In my defense, ultimately, I was going to let her climax eventually. Admittedly, I was still upset about what I saw at school. I honestly thought that I was over it after I went to the gym. I know I handled it in a somewhat childish way. I let my anger get the best of me. I know I shouldn't have let it ruin our night, and if Maggie hadn't asked Sydney a simple question, then everything would have been good. Not that I blame my aunt in the slightest. I knew it was an innocent question.

But the green monster of jealousy reared its ugly head, and I couldn't stop the thoughts that crept its way through the cracks to ruin a perfectly good evening. It also didn't help that Sydney kept asking me what was wrong what felt like every 5 minutes. I didn't even have time to fully process what I was feeling, let alone being able to sift through my thoughts properly.

Most of the time I said it was nothing because I didn't want to make a mountain out of a molehill. But Sydney was relentless on finding out why I was so upset.

On the ride back to her place I could see the agitation when I would sneak glances at her through my peripheral vision. I was just going to drop her off and then leave to go home so I could deal with it on my own. In the confines of my own home in order to search for some type of clarity.

Before I knew it, Sydney started yelling at me. At first, I wasn't going to answer, but I was already angry that yelling back at her seemed like the most logical choice at the time. It was purely out of defensiveness, and I couldn't stop the words from slipping.

I regretted saying that she was my fucking problem. I wanted to take it back as soon as the words slipped from my mouth, but I knew I couldn't. I knew deep down that she wasn't the problem. I didn't lie to her when I said it was my problem, it was a small attempt at taking back what I said. I know that doesn't erase it and Sydney deserves an actual apology from me.

I didn't want to argue. So, I did the only thing I could think of at the time. I seduced her, knowing full well the effect that I have on her. I used it to my advantage, am I ashamed of what followed? Honestly? In part no. I'm not. Now before you get the wrong idea and start calling me an asshole, which I'm sure you are, and I don't blame you. But just take a moment and try to see it from my prospective before you judge me.

Here's why I don't really feel ashamed. One; I got a nice striptease out of it. Try telling me you'd feel bad about that. Especially if said striptease was done by the object of your affection and on top of that it was because she wanted nothing more than to please you, willingly might I add.

Such in my case, the woman who stared back at me with emerald orbs that reminded me of the Amazon rainforest, with such want and need beneath them. Her caramel-colored skin glowed in the dim light as she stripped everything away, which to me was more than just her clothing.

A glint of arousal in her eyes, the lust emanating as she stripped herself bare, standing before me in just her lace panties. Exuding confidence, strength, vulnerability, eroticism, a true seductress.

Taunting me with all of these wonderful attributes and more. I was captivated by her, in complete awe as I watched her. It came to the point where I couldnt take it anymore. I needed her just as much as she needed me. I had every intention of driving us both to the point of ecstasy that we would have no other choice but to make love long into the early morning.

Then a thought occurred to me, which brings me to reason number two; It was sadistic in nature, but I couldn't resist what I did next. I wanted to teach her a lesson without her knowing. I was going to edge her a couple of times, but something awoke within me. I couldn't deny it. Call it revenge in its most sadistic form but edging her brought me a sense of satisfaction that I never knew existed. It turned me on knowing how much power and control I had over her.