I looked around me, I know this place. I was at the beach, a place that we shared dearly.
I gulped noticing a familiar figure from the distance sitting at a bench. It was dawn, the sky was lit up by the golden yellow orb. Reflecting on the blue surface of water, crashing softly at the shore.
The sky and the water almost meeting each other, for a second I thought they were one.
The male figure was still sitting there looking over the view.
I tried walking towards the man, out of my curiosity. Yet, seemingly every step was heavier and farther from the other. Every step the distance between us becomes farther away, my chest pounding.
There's something pulling me to him and something pulling me away from him, something I couldn't understand. Until I was chasing my breathe and my legs shaking.
Mustering up all the strengths had left in my body, I stood up holding my chest breathing deeply and cautiously. I can make it there, I have to, I don't know why, but I have to.
Suddenly I loss my balance, I close my eyes shut bracing myself hitting the sand. Instead, I found myself being held mid way and felt a pair of strong arms wrap around me. Slowly I opened my eyes, hoping it would be someone.
My eyes meet a pair of eyes, so familiar to me, it was Bleu and his eyes, but they were not the deep blue eyes I grew accustomed to, they were gray as if all the colors in it were flushed. We stared back at each other, almost as if both of us is searching for some kind of questions to thousands of unsaid questions.
My eyes focused on his eyes for awhile both of us stuck in time, stil I couldn't help but notice how glum his eyes were, how gray they were.
"B-Bleu?" I stuttered my brows scrunched in confusion.
Realizing the situation, I immediately pulled away from him and stood straighter, taking a step back.
"Is it really you?" I asked about to touch him before my legs gave out once again wobbling. Mikhail quickly grabbed me by my waist holding me up from collapsing.
He continued to hold me, while walking towards the bench. During the walk, he would constantly steal glances at me, trying to smile yet putting a facade.
Mikhail then sat me on the bench, sitting next to me, looking down. He was wearing a white shirt with black trousers, proud square shoulders, slightly arched, his face chiseled as ever, I could see him clearly now.
The light coming from the Sun was highlighting him softly.
"You haven't change at all," he said gaving me a weak smile then turning again to the look at the waves.
I don't know what to say, I have alot of questions in mind but I don't know what to tell him and how start. This wasn't just another vision from my dreams, finally I had my own mind and I can talk to him as me in the present.
"How have you been? Why do you stop writing? Are you tired? Of waiting?" he gulped looking somewhere far.
"Who are you? Who are you really, Bleu?" I asked trying to catch a glimpse of his eyes from the side.
He was silent and unmoving, until I noticed a small scar hiding behind his blonde hair on his forehead.
"What is that, what happened? I just noticed that now. " I asked, panic in my voice pointing at the scar.
Mikhail touched the scar, then looking at me, "long story."
Knowing him, he would always respond short but this time, his silence has something more that I want to hear. He would look at me, smiling then turning again to the see. I could feel he wants to say something but there's something holding him back.
Mikhail stood up, extending his hand at me, referring for us to leave. Led by my impulse, I pressed my body against his, hugging him tight.
"No, I wasn't tired of waiting, I never will be. I was just afraid."
"of what?" I hear him respond still hugging him.
"I'm afraid, of getting hurt on the process of waiting. The waiting itself I don't mind, I promise to wait for you, but I got scared what if I wasn't really waiting for something."
For a few seconds we were standing without moving waiting for each other's response, I, still pressing my body against his now harder and tighter.
Then he moved his shoulders cautiously, breaking free from my embrace and held his hand up almost touching my face. I froze hoping that he'd touch me, in this inch, never before this short distance seemed as far to me.
I saw a fire in his eyes greater than mine only to burn out with a weak smile.
"I will always and always find my way to you. I will come and find you, between lifetimes if not this one, I'd always come running to you," he held my hand kissing it gently before hugging me then kissing my head.
