Say you love me, please (Yeonbin fic)

<Chapter Twelve: Atlas>

Soon, it was Christmas- the first time, yeonjun would not be spending alone, but specifically with Soobin, kai and taehyun.

Hence, when the day came, the boys all gathered at Kai's house for Christmas dinner along with his parents- the mom was known to be Jasmine and the dad was David. The couple looked more foreign, more features of Americans than Kai but spoke fluent Korean and even the dishes were Korean based too. Yes, the best home cooked meals that yeonjun had ever tasted in his life. Moreover, Kai's parents were also very kind, lively and as cheerful as their son.

After the dinner, Jasmine offered them some cheesy lasagna as a dessert. Yeonjun had never eaten a lasagna in his life and was very much delighted when he tasted it- felt so fascinating when the addicting, savory flavor exploded on the taste buds, and thus he went for the second round.

When the stomachs were filled, all of them sat around the living room floor to play UNO and the loser, who was left with the most cards, was made to drink some whiskey shots.

As they played, the house was filled with their chaotic laughter and cries of UNOs. Taehyun mostly failed the game and therefore had gone home with a half drunken state, yapping about some rockets launched from NASA. Soon after, as the night deepened, Yeojun and Soobin also excused themselves from the Huening family .

Upon reaching back to their apartment, Yeonjun had given soobin a creamy colored sweater and soobin in exchange, gave him some pretty silver earrings that has little star dangling from it. The pair didn't plan to actually swap gifts with each other but in the midst of busy school hours, yeonjun managed to get a gift for his boyfriend.

However, he wan't excepting Soobin to return the favor.

"You look good with earrings so i bought you this" was what soobin whispered when his hands reached out to the older boy's ears to place the earrings on.

It might sound odd but to yeonjun, little things like that seemed to carry more intimacy than their lust filled nights and honestly he wished to savor more sweet actions from Soobin like that.

The way it should be. The way they should be.

Time passed in a blink as spring turned into summer.

It was their final year of their university and Soobin had been going to more school parties. He always did ask if the older wanted to follow but Yeonjun, with his anxiety issues and his last shitty experience, he always declined it.

And soon, soobin just doesn't offer him any more invitations.

It does saddened the pink haired boy when he has to go to bed without his lover at least once for every week but he wouldn't be vocal about it.

He would always understand soobin.

So every party nights when soobin wasn't present, yeonjun tried to practice cooking again, mainly to distract his miserable mind. It's not that he doesn't trust enough but the sight of his boyfriend returning home drunk at 3 ams does worries yeonjun a bit, maybe a lot.

At least he's still beside him every mornings right? He shouldn't complain.

So every morning after Soobin partied, Yeonjun woke up early to prepare some kimchi stew as a hang over soup. The first time, he told the taller that he made a soup for him, the other had given him a weird look. It's understandable. It's not like yeonjun had ever cooked in front of the younger before. Nonetheless, the taller boy had silently drank the soup.

"Oh it actually taste good- Made my head feels a bit better.. Thanks for the soup junnie"

As he continued to finish the warm soup slowly, Soobin had flashed a smile at him- and only then yeonjun could sighed of relief but not without the cloud of bitterness. Yeonjun had returned the smile.

It was a Saturday afternoon.

Soobin didn't pick Yeonjun up that day since he was meeting up with his gang for another party.

So after his hospital routine, the older causaully stopped by a supermarket to grab more groceries- now that he's cooking more frequently.

Been trying to cook more, doesn't mean the boy actually know how to shop for goodies yet. So there yeonjun was standing in front of the meat display part, contemplating which pork pieces would be suitable for making a stew.

"Yeonjun?"

His thought were halted as a familiar voice approached from behind, the voice he dreaded. Nervously licking his lips, yeonjun turned to look at the owner of the rough voice.

"d..dad?"

A hand swiftly grabbed his hair in an instant.

"why are you calling me dad now you little shit" 

Yeonjun yelped and tried to push off the man with all the strength he could muster but with little luck, he failed.

The man only tightened his hold and at this point, a few passersby has thrown them either annoyed or worried glances.

"pl..please let me go" the smaller boy choked out from. The stinging grip on the hair was making his scalp scream in pain.

"why should I? you ungrateful little bish. I raised you for years yet you ran away and now appearing in front of me looking quite fine huh? Did you get yourself some sugar daddy? You look like a little disgusting whore don't you?"

With a drunken force, the older man threw the boy down and Yeonjun hissed as he was met with the hard marble floor. Immediately he felt a kick to his ribs.

Shielding himself seemed to be unsuccessful as the sharp burning pain pierced through his lungs. Vision was blurred once the man crouched down to slap yeonjun's face, the milky skin getting scratched as the nasty nails dragged across the flesh in process. At this point, an awful lot presence of more people around them was visible, with the distant shouts of what it seemed like security guards.

Yeonjun gasped for breath as his heart squeezed in panic. He could normally endure the physical assaults but being surrounded by strangers- too nosy and heartless to stare him down, made his skin crawl in humiliation. When security guards finally dragged his father away, the pink haired abruptly stood up and staggered out of the building, away from the preying eyes to his safe place.

When he arrived, to his dismay yet his relieve, soobin was not there. He was disappointed that his lover was not there to comfort him but then he was also glad that soobin doesn't need to witness his pathetic state.

Yeonjun was trembling like a leaf as his head was filled with a throbbing headache. His face was now swollen with some bloody scratches accompanied by bruised lips. His sprained angle, from the result of running clumsily, was now screaming in pain as it demands him to bandaged it up quickly. But yeonjun couldn't care less to clean himself - there was only little energy enough to crashed his limped body onto the couch.

Quiet sobs soon filled the dead air- though it was not intentional. Yeonjun doesn't want to cry. He felt weak.

Living with soobin, his body was already used to being in a peaceful state , so with this sudden assault, the frail body seemed to take it too tough. Moreover, yeonjun was actually scared of his father killing him, for the first time in his life. The apparent angry red he saw in old man's eyes earlier - shook him with dread and fear to the point where a panic attack was about to get triggered. A part of him, once again wished for his boyfriend's presence.

But that would be selfish of him right?

And so yeonjun did the smartest thing to find his way of comfort.

Later that evening, with the help of the Ativan tablets- delivered swiftly as per request, Yeonjun could finally regain the control of his nerves. Only then the pinked haired boy managed to pick himself up from the spot drenched from the long hours of salty tears.