Changes of the Heart (FanFic)

Chapter 27

CHAPTER 27

    

“Watcha readin’?” Changmin leaned over to look.

“It’s Ji-hyun’s book. It looked interesting, so I picked it up. I just started, want to read with me?” Changmin glanced tentatively at Jaejoong.

“It looks like a really good book.” I added to get his attention and convince him.

“Sure, ok…”

He sat behind me and rested his chin on my shoulder as we read together. We were half-way through the second chapter before Jaejoong noticed us.

“Yah! Maknae, what are you two doing over there?” He didn’t sound upset, just suspiciously and obnoxiously curious.

“Just reading.” I answered annoyedly as Changmin moved away from me.

Jaejoong stood up. “Can I read too?” He sat in between Changmin and I, separating us.

“Jaejoong, I’m not finished!” Ae Cha whined.

“Go let Ae Cha finish her drawing.” I scolded him. “It’s rude to leave her hanging like that.”

“But I want to read with you.” He said softly in my ear. His breath in my ear made me shiver. “Why can’t she come over here and finish?”

I looked at him. “Jaejoong!”

Now he looked upset. “Fine! If you would rather spend time with Changmin, I’ll go sit with Ae Cha. At least she wants to spend time with me…”

I rolled my eyes. He was acting stuck up and I wasn’t about to get into an argument with him right now, so I just let his go. I looked over at Changmin, but he didn’t look like he felt much like reading anymore, so I sighed and closed to book. I sat back against the tree we were sitting under and watch the three-way soccer match that looked like it might go on forever. The three of them were all great at s[port and very competitive. They were tired and panting and hot and sweaty, but they looked determined and relentless. Ji-hyun was fight were the boys’ respect. And I had an idea of what Junsu and Yoochun were fighting for. Then the sky turned dark and lighting flashed. I looked up, my eyes dazzled by the flashing light. Yunho, Junsu, and Ji-hyun came running over with the soccer ball.

“I totally won.” Ji-hyun said cockily.

“Maybe we should go inside.” Yunho looked up at the grey clouds.

Ae Cha and Jaejoong looked at him, said, “Ok.” And got up to leave.

The rain started to fall in tiny trickles. I didn’t move. Neither did Changmin. Thunder crashed and rolled and Ji-hyun, Ae Cha, Jaejoong, Junsu, and Yunho, made a run for it. It started pouring, but I just looked up at it, fascinated by each drop of water that fell.

“I love watching the rain…” I murmured.

When Jaejoong noticed I was not with him, he ran back for me and threw his jacket over my head.

“Come on, Sun-hi! You shouldn’t let yourself get wet or else you’ll catch a cold!”

I looked up at him. “But I like the rain. I don’t mind it. It’s not that cold.”

He took my hand and pulled me up beside him. “I don’t want you to get sick.” He started leading me away, then threw hastily over his shoulder, “Come on, Changmin, you too.”

    

We made it inside safely, although Jaejoong, Changmin, and I were a bit wet… We sat in the empty student lounge. It was rare for the student lounge to be empty, but I guess a lot of people taking advantage of what was a nice day had gotten caught in the rain. Everyone else was still in class. I closed the door and locked it so the guys would be able to take off their “disguises” and relax without worrying about anyone seeing them. Somehow Ae Cha and Jaejoong were sitting together without me having to arrange it—and there was an empty right next to Changmin… I went for it, but Jaejoong jumped up and took it, forcing Changmin to scoot down and making me to sit next to Ae Cha instead. The seating arrangement went like this: Yoochun, Junsu, Ji-hyun, Yunho, Ae Cha, me, Jaejoong, and Changmin. I noticed he was acting strange. Not just jealous, like he didn’t want me to sit next to Changmin. More like he was struggling with something inside him and felt the need to keep me close. I had absolutely no idea why. Then I got a thought. I was sure he kept staring over at me, and every time I even turned my head in his direction, he’d look away quickly. But I caught him once, by moving just my eyes over and not my head. He was staring my way. Or so it seemed. It wasn’t really directly at me, though. I looked over at Ae Cha, but she looked down. Something was weird…

    

Trapped inside by the rain, we found games to play until it stopped and we were free to leave.

“We’ll definitely have to do this again some time.” Ji-hyun stated.

We all agreed. Junsu and Yunho most of all. I laughed to myself at them. Can you be any more obvious? When we got back home, Ji-hyun was all those two could talk about.

“Can you believe it? I’ve never seen a girl do a bicycle kick like that!” Junsu exclaimed.

“Ya, she’s amazing…” Yunho said.

Then Yunho and Junsu looked at each other, surprised, as if they’d just realized that they liked the same girl. Then they glared at each other. They were officially in competition.

Jaejoong took me by the arm and pulled me aside. “Let’s go on a date tonight.”

I raised my eyebrows. “Tonight? But we went out last night.”

Jaejoong shrugged. “So? I want to spend time with you.”

I put my hands on my hips. “What are you talking about? You spend time with me every day.”

He took my hands in his and said softly, “But this is different…”

“You know if we go out in public too much, someone will notice us together and recognize you. Do you want our relationship to be broadcasted all over the world?”

He looked deep into my eyes. “Yes.”

“Why? Because you love me so much you can’t hold back anymore? Or because you think it’ll protect you from falling for someone else?”

He blinked at me, stunned. I sighed and shook my head. I wasn’t going to go through this with him right now. I pulled my hands away and took a step back, nodding my head.

“Ok, let’s go. I think going out tonight is a good idea. I’ll go get ready.” And with that, I turned and walked away.

    

I changed into a short dress with a tutu-style skirt over a pair of dress pants with a cute hat. I quickly sprayed perfume over myself and grabbed my purse. I didn’t really about how I looked tonight. I made a quick dinner of ramen for the other four boys before we left and hesitated by the door, hearing them laugh and shout and play over some random board game. It sounded like so much fun…I wanted to stay. But Jaejoong was waiting for me. I turned to him and he took my hand. He gave me one his “Don’t’ you know I love you?” looks that always made me smile and I followed him out. We found a quaint little restaurant and requested a table in a far, dark corner. And there we wasted away hours of idleness, for now, I wasn’t the only one pretending. I wasn’t the only one in denial. I wasn’t the only one deceiving myself…

    

On the way home from our date, I felt sudden urge to confess to Jaejoong. To tell him that I still thought about Changmin, even when I was with him. He deserved for me to be honest with him, but at the same time… It was impossible for me to hurt him like that. He truly loved me and…as much as I’d fought it…over time, my heart had changed. I loved him too. That was what hurt the most. I’d let myself love someone else. But how could I be in love with two men at the same time? I had convinced myself that I wasn’t, but… I looked over at Jaejoong and put my hand over his. He glanced at me.

Then, because I knew he needed to hear it, I said, “I love you, Jaejoong.”

This made him smile, and I found that when he smiled, I was happy.