𝐭𝐚𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞. « 𝘳𝘪𝘤𝘬𝘺 𝘣𝘰𝘸𝘦𝘯 »

› 11 › complicated

"what a mess the past 24 hours have been..."

"what a mess the past few hours have been," howie sighs as he slumps beside me on nini's couch.

it's now 5 am. we had to wake kourtney and nini up to get them inside the apartment and into respective bedrooms. it was...messy, like howie said. let's just say it took a lot of pushing, whining, and stumbles to make it to this point.

"and we still have jack to deal with..." howie groans, resting his head on the back of the sofa, looking hopelessly up the ceiling. "thank god we have no classes today."

"even if we did, i'd skip," i say honestly. my eyelids threaten to close and i can literally feel the bags under my eyes grow bigger.

howie reluctantly stands up and holds out a hand. "we should go—"

a door bursts open and nini comes running out with her hand covering her mouth, rushing into the bathroom nearby.

kourtney makes her way out her room loudly as well. she bangs on the door and shouts, "can you keep it down?!"

i shake my head as i turn back to face howie. "we can't leave them like this. one of us has to stay." i pause for a moment before adding, "i'll do it."

"what? no, not after what happened tonight. or last night. whatever," he argues.

"bro, i don't want to deal with jack. and i don't think i can drive properly in this state," i point to myself - wrecked and vulnerable. "so..."

howie sighs once again before patting me on the shoulder. "okay. take care of yourself. and get some sleep."

° ° °

"do you remember anything from last night?"

my eyes are closed but i know it's daytime by now. i slept like a log. but hey, i feel so much better. last night didn't go as planned, but some good things did happen too.

shifting uncomfortably on the sofa, i'm about to stretch and get up when i register the conversation currently going on near me.

"kourtney. do you remember what happened last night?"

there's a slight stress in nini's words. somewhere in there is a hint of desperation too.

i feel bad for eavesdropping but...

the whole point of last night was to find out what happened to them. and try to fix it. or force them to fix it...

a cup gets placed on the counter and it's clear someone - kourtney maybe - is pouring water into it.

"i'm talking to you, kourt..."

"oh, now you want to talk..." kourtney says bitterly. "looks like you made your decision anyway... you're on a hiatus, aren't you?"

i've never seen or heard them argue before. it's leaving a sour taste on my tongue. or maybe that's because i have morning breath right now...

"and what about it? you just don't get it. you've never understood," nini retorts spitefully.

"but i do. you haven't changed - or well, you have, actually. for the worst."

"that's harsh."

"the truth isn't always pretty, honey."

"can we not talk about this? i was watching your stream last night. if i hadn't come—"

"if you hadn't come, ricky wouldn't have blacked out," kourtney says fiercely.

my body tenses up. i didn't expect to be brought into the conversation.

there's a pause before i hear nini's confusion. "what?"

"there was a post-it by the bed i was sleeping in," kourtney explains. she hesitates before adding, "from... howie. he explained what happened. you threw a bottle at him. he was drenched in alcohol."

nini clears her throat. "okay, i wasn't at my best. i still don't understand how that knocked him out. unless i actually hit him on the head with—"

"what game are you playing at, neens? you haven't talked to him for years and suddenly you drag him away to your apartment - you're leading him on," kourtney interrupts again. "you have no idea of what he's been through this whole time. you never have."

"since when have you taken his side? what happened to my best friend??"

"i think you've forgotten what it means to be a friend."

"oh, grow up, this isn't high school," nini says in irritation as footsteps start moving away. i think kourtney is walking out.

i have to do something.

i let out the loudest, most exaggerated yawn i can muster and stand up, stretching my arms out as if i've just awaken.

"that was some good sleep," i announce. "very good. excellent sleep. couch was great. wow."

okay, maybe i wasn't the best actor back in east high.

kourtney stops moving and turns around to face me. she's still wearing the same outfit as yesterday. "it's 3 pm, bowen. let's go back."

i uneasily shift my eyes from her to nini. the tension is unsettling.

i can hardly guess the exact details, but something serious really drove them apart. it has something to do with nini's break... if i can figure why that is then i can help them reconcile. and maybe learn more about why nini became this different.

after all, the nini i knew would never snap back like that. not to kourtney.

it hurts a little though - i didn't recognize any hint of concern when kourtney talked about me to her... it's like she didn't care.

it checks out i guess. her new catchphrase now seems to be, "i don't care."

but hearing kourtney defend me means a lot.

"you're different, you know."

nini's words from last night come back to me. what did she mean?

who am i kidding, does it matter? it's not about me. i don't matter right now. it's what's going on between them that matters.

"are you going to keep staring at us or what?" nini laughs lightly. she walks pass me to ruffle my hair. "get going, spacey head."

another thing to add to the list of "new" things about nini: she uses nicknames now.

kourtney rolls her eyes and turns away.

this is going to be more complicated than i thought.