WOMAN - H.S

34.

"Mom? What if the sun doesn't wake up tomorrow?" I looked at her as she sat on the side of my bed tucking me in.

She looked at me with nothing but a soft smile.

She rubbed her thumb softly on my cheek, a quiet loving sigh passing her lips.

"You know I had the exact same thought when I was your age?" She asked. "I would stay up all night staring out the window, worrying it was really day time and the sun had disappeared." She quietly laughed at her younger self.

She poked my nose with her pointer finger making me smile.

"The world has been turning for over Three trillion years, the sun rising each day and setting each night. Without the sun the world wouldn't be beautiful, we wouldn't see it." She whispered looking down at me.

"I want you to remember this, Yesterday was history, tomorrow is a mystery, but today—today is a gift. That is why it is called a present"

"The sun will wake up everyday to shine its light watching as you breathe, even on your worst day's...and when the sun goes to sleep it sends the moon out all night for you to talk to it when you can't sleep." She told me.

"They'll always be there, Anna baby, even when the sky is full of the darkest clouds you'll ever see." She said, pressing a kiss to my head.

"Always..."

* * * * *

I didn't sleep last night, I stayed up all night staring at the moon waiting for the sun to rise.

For the first time since I was a child, I thought the sun was gone.

I was hoping the sun was gone.

I want to say that if I knew my life was going to stay stopped at a forked road for a while, I would have just slept through all of this, but I know I wouldn't have if I had the choice.

It's been a month.

She was starting to loose her hair again.

Everyone was still in Indiana, Mom was happy that the house was full with everyone she loved.

Olive, Mom and I sat down last night and put together a photo album of our past year, all of us laughing as we wrote a memory on the back of the photo.

Anne was here as well as support for my mother and Harry.

I think what hurt me the most was telling Rex his favorite person was leaving this earth early.

I can't get the look he had on his face out of my head.

He had told me, "I won my battle just for her to lose her's" it shattered me in every way.

"That's not true Rex. Your grandma is winning, she got to live longer than the doctor told her she would. They said three years ago in the next six years it could come back stronger. It did. But she's still here, the day's are just getting more and more precious." I told him trying to keep myself composed.

Harry had been my person.

When things would start to hurt he would take me for a drive, putting on his cowboy hat just to go out of his way to make me smile.

My habits of dancing things out were back, some nights I'd find myself standing in the middle of the neighborhood trying to catch a breath that was somehow stolen from me.

Olive took the news pretty hard.

We spent half the night in her room together just silent.

Mom refuses to stay on bed rest until she absolutely cant get out of bed and I wasn't going to fight her on that.