I am NOT and Never Will Be A Jedi

Bantha Burger

        In case you have been wondering, I'm really not that good of an athlete. I also have galactic asthma which really acts up when I run. So let's just say, keeping Anakin, Palo, and Padme from figuring out what was really going on, really made me wish I had belrought my inhaler.
        "But I'm hungry!"
        "Well I need to use the bathroom!"
        "Again? This is like, the sixth time!"
"I can't help it! I have a small bladder!" I replied, which really wasn't a lie at all.
        Anakin and I had been walking in circles while Palo showed Padme the History of Republic Diplomats Portriats display which happened to be right by the food court. I couldn't allow Anakin to be anywhere near them so the only art we looked at was the graffiti on the bathroom walls.
       After six bathrooms breaks, three false booger alarms, and a convincing "I dropped my pen in the toilet" ploy, I had managed to keep Anakin from any eye contact with Padme and Brown-Eyed Butt Head aka Palo.
        Too bad I ran out of potty excuses.
"Well you can go to the bathroom yourself. I'm gonna go get a Krayt Bacon Burger at the food court." I bit my lip as Anakin fled the bathroom while I washed my hands until my skin was raw. "Wait!" I called after him but a big ugly Bith waltzed in front of me. I tried to see over him but it was no use, Anakin was racing toward Bantha Burger at lightspeed. I tapped the shoulder of the Bith man, "Um excuse me, can I get past?" I asked urgently but still politely. The man turned around and grunted, "Are you supposed to be somesort of Jedi?" he asked, staring me down. What is it with my people skills that makes eveyone want to chew me up and spit me out?
        "I'm a Youngling, thank you very much," I replied, crossing my arms. The Bith only shrugged and shifted out of the way. I managed a 'thank you' and chased after Anakin.
       I swear he must have used a Jedi mind trick to cut through the line because Anakin was already at the front, placing his order. "-Can I get a side of Chuba Chips and an extra large beebleberry shake with that?" he asked the cashier.
      I pushed to the front as hungry alien customers glared at me. I really must be popular. "Anakin, why don't we just go back to the bathroom?" I asked hastily. Anakin leaned on the counter, "Come on Grease, I'm hungry. Would you hold your Nerfs for one minute?" I tugged his sleeve, "I'm pretty sure someone left some Starfries on the floor of the bathroom. You can eat those!" I guaranteed. Anakin chuckled, "Ooh, that reminds me- Ma'am, can I get an order of Starfries too?" he asked the woman at the counter who only rolled her eyes and nodded.
      I probably would have settled down and let Anakin order his food in peace had I not noticed Padme and Palo heading straight toward the line at Bantha Burger. "Oh Sith..." I muttered, "Anakin, can we get your meal to-go?" Anakin turned to the lady at the counter for the answer. She nodded with annoyance and called back to the cook, "Make it a to-go!"
        I kept my eyes on Padme and her dumb boyfriend, realizing that we would never be able to get past them without someone noticing. When Anakin's order came, he snatched the bag, "Did you remember my toy?" he asked the lady who didn't even answer but marched into the kitchen mumbling something about "ungrateful, no-good, customers" and retiring before she "knocked someone into the next galaxy".
        The line was getting shorter and we were dangerously close to Padme and Palo. "Anakin!" I shrieked. Anakin dug through his bag, "Hang on Grease, I need to ask for extra Fatfish sauce..."
       I had no choice. I had to distract him before my whole scheme fell apart. So right there in the middle of Bantha Burger, I dropped to the ground and faked the most dramatic coughing spell I could muster up. Anakin looked at me as if I had grown wings. "You okay Grease?" he asked.
I sputtered and clutched my chest, "Galactic asthma... Need inhaler..." I wheezed. Anakin groaned, "But my sauce-" he whined but I grabbed at his pant leg as customers looked my way. "I'm dying!" I exclaimed.
       I almost thought Anakin would allow me to die right there but after a moment off consideration, he picked me up off the ground and tossed me over his shoulder. "Fine!" he muttered.
      
A moment later and Padme and Palo would have been right in our way and the plan would have been blown but Anakin and I exited the museum without trouble. Well, unless you consider me almost having a real asthma attack to be trouble.
He dropped me on the steps outside the museum and sat down to watch me cough up my lungs which I very well could have done. When my performance was finished, I wiped away the forming tears from my eyes. "Thanks Anakin..." I managed.
        "Bantha dung!" he exclaimed under his breath as he sifted through his lunch bag. I lean over, "Sorry you didn't get your Fatfish sauce," I apologized.
Anakin shook his head, "No it's not that. They forgot to give me a toy..."