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GREY KINGSTON
the next day is bright and sunny out. it's the complete opposite of everyone's mood.
we buried beth today and had a funeral for her. that was about an hour ago, and since then i've been sitting inside the church at one of the pews.
the sun is shining through the stained glass windows, cascading beautiful rainbow colors all over the place.
i keep replaying last night over in my head. we were so close to having beth back with us, so close to getting maggie to her, but it just went wrong so fast.
i'm drawn out of my thoughts as rick quietly takes a seat next to me. he doesn't say anything, just stares ahead at the altar. i watch as he places his hand on my knee.
"i feel like—" i blink, tears spilling over onto my cheeks. "i feel like the past couple weeks, all i've been thinkin' about is beth. ever since she got taken by that damn car ... then she shows up out of no where, and just like that she's gone again. gone, forever. maybe if i would've just gone with them or—or if i would've killed gorman somehow, she'd still be—"
"no." he shakes his head. "no, you can't think like that."
"but what if i did? what if i did anything different than what i actually did? she'd still be alive."
"and you wouldn't be here." he says.
i taste the saltiness of my tears as they drip onto my lips. rick places his arm around my shoulders, pulling me into his side.
"it's nobody's fault but the man who shot her."
"maggie wants to leave."
"leave the church?" he asks.
"yeah. i don't blame her, i wouldn't wanna be here anymore either if i were her."
"well, it is kind of a shitty place to be. out in the middle of the woods, no place to look for supplies." he says. "you really think we can trust noah?"
i lift my head off his shoulder to look him in the eyes, "you're askin' me?"
"you know i trust your judgement."
i think it over for a second and then nod my head, "yeah, i think we can trust him. beth seemed like she did. and he's just a kid, looks like he's seen a lot."
rick nods his head, "then he's one of us. i'm gonna go talk to him, you wanna come with?"
"nah, i'm gonna head outside. see how everyone's doin'."
"okay." he smiles, giving my leg a squeeze and then standing up from the pew.
i watch as he heads into the back rooms of the church. noah spent the night in there and just headed back in after we buried beth.
