Love in Darkness

Chapter 44: Torment inside

It has been a week and Selena was never the same. Her once radiating smile could no longer shine through the house. It was silent and brooding, careful not to make a sound that will disturb Selena. Selena still continues to lock herself in her room. Miss Luna continues to pursue Selena to eat, encourage her for a walk and even encourage her to continue attending medical school. Anything, just anything besides her hiding in their room. But to no avail, her weight continues to decrease.

It has been a week but ever since then while in the middle of the night, she screams for the pain as the nightmare continues to haunt her sleep. She would scream for her lost baby that she longed to hold but could not anymore. Her nightmares are the same.

She is in that bedroom and on that corner, there is the incubator where her baby is. She walks towards it and sees the baby boy fighting to survive. She takes the baby out of the incubator seeing that he is having a hard time breathing and carries him, "I am going to keep you safe.". The baby looks better as he snuggles on Selena's touch. Selena is smiling while rocking the baby to sleep and kissing his forehead. Then the scene of the dream changed like it always does. Everything is white and black. The baby in her arms is gone. From the distance, Selena sees a small figure. "There is my little boy.". Selena walks and walks to reach her son but she could not arrive like the last time. She always could not come close to him. The boy turns to look at her. She continues to walk but faster. The boy smiles and then said, "Goodbye, mommy. It is time for me to go. I am sorry I have to leave you but I will be by your side always. Do not forget about me, mommy, okay?". Upon hearing that, Selena panics and starts running toward the boy, "No, do not leave me.". The boy keeps getting further away while looking at her with a smile. Selena tries to catch up but just like the other nightmares, the boy disappears.

Miss Luna is beside her as Selena turns her body from side to side, empathizing with her pain. Selena wakes up from the nightmare while saying, "No, do not leave me!". Tears are flowing down from her tears. Miss Luna feels so sad for her. She embraces Selena while caressing her hair, "Sshh.". Miss Luna could only comfort her. She continues to hug Selena while rubbing her back and caressing her hair until she falls asleep. For a week that it has been like this, it became a routine. Miss Luna worries about Selena so much. She constantly thinking of a way to bring back the old her. "But how? I have already tried everything.", she thought to herself.

Everyone feels the fragile thread of the family, for the loss of the baby, as well as the relationship of the couple. Magnus, hearing her agony could only stand outside the bedroom door every night. He would hear her loud sobbing and his grandmother's voice continue to comfort her with her words. His heart aches, he feels useless. Because of this, each night he wants to go in there and comfort his wife but he would always stop himself from doing anything. He would tremble to reach for the door handle, but in the end, would choose to stand still and then would walk away. He could not bear to see the pain that he caused Selena. He was a coward, he could only mourn for the death that prevailed in their house.

A few minutes later, a maid carrying the tray of food for Selena, stopped to open the door of the bedroom. Magnus lowly utters. "I'll bring it in. You can go now." The maid is surprised. Almost hesitant, the maid gives the tray to Magnus. He tremblingly reaches for the doorknob until he musters the courage to slowly open the door. The door creaks as Magnus made his way in. Selena is still in the arms of Miss Luna, already fallen asleep.

Seeing that his wife is asleep, he slowly walks his way towards his grandmother and places the tray next to the bedside table. He looks at Miss Luna and asks, "How is she?". Miss Luna looks at her grandson with a stern face and confronts him, "I know you are always outside of the door. So I am guessing you know the answer to your question.". Magnus' face is filled with sadness. Miss Luna sighs, "I am sorry. I am sorry, I can't help to talk to you this way. I am still mad at you.".