A Glimpse Into My Life (Let Go and Let God)

Chapter 2

I sat steadily on the couch and listened. She really had a temperament and I too was afraid of her a little.

Her temper must have came from those old wounds and gruesome memories. So I don't blame her, she never really had a childhood.

The fight was getting intense, my baby sister on the other hand began crying.

"I'm so sick and tired of everything!" Mom yelled.

I couldn't bear to listen, I couldn't even do anything. This brought me back to 08, it reminded me of the gruesome night.
Everything came right back to haunt me.

I took Reign and walked out. The neighbors outside could hear every single conversation from their room. You know how loud an African woman could be.

I don't know what caused it but it was so crazy in there. You know how Africans are, especially Liberians, they'll stick their noses where it don't belong.

Reign couldn't stop crying. At this point I was confused. How can I tame a 5 year old when I can't tame myself?

At that age I had nothing, no one but she's lucky, I'm here for her even though I'm going through a lot.

There's nowhere to run to right now, I  wasn't even strong but I pretended to be. Maybe I would in the future but as for now, I can't lie.

I sat outside, still pretending to be strong and listening to music. But I still couldn't. Reign kept crying and crying and I don't know how to calm her down because I'm not calmed myself.

It was so lonely, scary, confusing, dramatic, noisy and boring growing up. It became more lonely and scary when my mom left my dad. At first, I  thought she left me but really it was my dad she left.

She did it for her own sanity and well-being.