for the best...?

thirty three

Y/N POV
i just got back from radiation and winnie is still sleeping. "baby" i kissed her cheek and she stirred alittle "pooh" i said and kissed her nose. this time she opened her eyes and squinted "goodmorning how are you feeling" she asked "goodmorning, i'm feeling a bit tired but i'm ready to be in the studio" i told her and slipped off my hoodie, it's hot "can you come with me to the bathroom" she asked and i giggled "sure" i said and immediately put my hand over my eyes. "y/n you can look i don't care" she told me and i kept my eyes closed until she finished. she then stood infront of the sink so wrapped my arms around her as she brushed her teeth. she had to spit it out and fix her hair so i leaned on the door and waited til she was done. when she was done she came up to me and hugged me. "we look good" she told me and i giggled "i'm serious we compliment eachother perfectly" she said "yeah i know" i assured her and kissed her. we pulled away out of breath then pecked eachother lips acouple more times "picture" she asked and i took a mirror picture of us. "okay we have to get ready because we have to be there before giveon" i told her and her jaw dropped "you're working with giveon" she asked as we walked into my bedroom "yeah apparently he has a song that he really likes but he wants someone to rap on it. then he heard i was trying to rap alittle more on this album so he's going to give it to me" i explained and threw on shorts and a shirt. "how should i dress" she asked me "it gets hot in the studio so comfortable but not overdressed" i said and she nodded "can i take one of your shirts" she asked "go ahead" i told her and put on some slides. it's crazy how her and i kinda just fall into a grove, she's so perfect. "i'm ready" she said breaking me out of my thoughts "okay let's go" i held my hand out which she gladly took and we walked out of my house.
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"that's going to be fire" justin said to giveon and i. he ended up coming to see what i was working on. "this is definitely good to start for the rapping" he added and i nodded "yeah this bout to be a hit" giveon said and we all talked about random shit. i looked over at winnie to see her already looking at me, she smiled at me and i winked at her with alittle smirk. "y/n" my manager popped his head into the room "hey wassup cutie" i joked and he flipped me off "i'm telling my husband" he told me and i shook my head "anyways we have to have a meeting after your done here with acouple directors" he said and i gave him a thumbs up "okay make sure your husbands there so i can hit on him" i smiled "babe" winnie exclaimed "gosh can i quit" my manager said as his head disappeared "YOULL MISS ME TOO MUCH" i yelled to him and we all laughed. "what's the meeting about" giveon asked "so you know my song 1-800-273-8255" i asked and hailey and winnie walked up to listen "yeah" they all said in sync "so i had this crazy idea about making a music video about it and the concept is like ugh it's hard to explain" i said "can we come to the meeting" justin asked "yeah definitely" i told him and pulled winnie to me "i love seeing you in your era" she said and i pecked her lips "thank you baby" i pecked her lips again and looked up "all i have to do for this song is finish my verse" i told giveon "bet i have to go on a date right now so when you finish send me it" he said and dapped me up "remember don't kiss on the first date" i told him and winnie pinched me "yeah whatever" he brushed me off then said his goodbyes to everyone else. "so can i show you this one song before we go to the meeting justin" i asked him and he nodded so i pulled out my notes on my phone and pulled the beat up. "ouuu i like this" he told me "yeah so i want something like" i took a deep breath "life's not easy mmmmmmmmm don't forget that i'm human mmmmmmm" i hummed the parts that i didn't know yet and he nodded "i like the pace that it's going" i gave him my phone so he could see what i had and maybe add some things "it's a very up beat and a sad song kinda" he told me and i nodded "exactly" i said and sighed "let's go get this meeting over with then we can get food" i told everyone and gathered my things. "so any love songs" hailey teased me as i locked the studio up "yeah like 2 that are for sure going on the album" i confirmed and smiled at winnie "guess what" i said "what" winnie asked and intertwined our fingers "one of your favorite artists is in one" i smirked "which one" she asked "cant spill the beans pooh, just know you'll love it" i smiled and we entered the meeting room "y/n" the director exclaimed and shook my hand. we all took a seat at the table and i took a deep breath knowing i was going to have to explain this. "so what's the concept" he asked and i cleared my throat "so i want there to be three parts just like the chorus and how it changes" i explained and he nodded "so i want it to be like my story and what i had to go through with my parents and stuff" i said and he nodded again "but i want it to be a guy" i broke the ice and he looked at me confused "there's been some cases of colored gay males getting murdered due to either their culture or just people targeting them. which is way worse than anything so i wanna have the story line be a colored kid who is closeted, with a love interest, and him having to go through that by himself. then a happy ending with his family and the kid he was with when he was younger at a wedding getting married" i finished and let out a deep breath "i actually really love that, it kinda goes with the concept of the song even tho it can go with many different stories. plus you're spreading awareness as well" he said and i nodded "yeah so the first chorus is 'i want you to be alive' so i was thinking that's when he would get outed in some way then run away from home, and i'm 'telling' him through the song that i want him to be alive. the second chorus is 'i finally wanna be alive' where he's still going through it and he's at the lowest ever, that's when he's having a breakdown and is about to end it. then khalids part is him calling up the hotline, but at his last line is going to be him and the kind from highschool getting married with their families support" i finished and leaned back in my chair "i like the way you think y/n" he told me and i smiled "thank you" i nod and we wrap it up. "that was a lot" justin said "yeah honestly i just had this random idea one day and it's finally happening" i smiled and winnie wrapped her arms around me "i'm proud of you" she said and kissed me "thank you" i said and hugged her "hailey and i are going to go home and make some babies" hailey hit him "but i'll call you tomorrow" he said and hugged me. we bid our goodbyes and went to my car. "what now" i asked winnie "i need some food" she said "then we will get you some food" i told her and rested my hand on her thigh.
ARIANA POV
"so you don't like my friends" i asked dalton "listen you can hangout with them all you want but i personally think they're annoying" he shrugged and continued to do work on his computer "i mean that's kinda rude because they are my friends, but no matter what you'll have to deal with them" i told him "okay ariana i get it" he annoying said and i sighed
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"you've told people we've been dating for 5 months already" i asked him "yeah we technically have" he shrugged and tried to cuddle into me "dalton" he cut me off "ariana just go with it, you're so picky" he complained and i just shut up. whatever.
Y/N POV
"so is that your story on coming out" right now winnie and i are laying down... more like i'm laying down and winnie is straddling my stomach. she told me it's comfortable so i'm just letting her do her thing. "you know how i'm intersex" i asked and she nodded "so my parents thought i was a boy until they found out i wasn't, they took me to church every sunday and wednesday. they made the priest scrub my body to get the 'freak ness' out of it. they basically treated me as a demon" i explained and she pouted "they had this plan that when i was 18 they would cut my dick off so i would be a 'normal' girl and marry a guy. instead when i was 16 i ran away and was living at my grandparents until my songs started to blow up enough to where i could afford my own place" i added and she kissed me, for some reason that calmed my nerves. "you don't have to continue" she said against my lips "no this is important for you to know" i told her and she sat back up and gave me a signal to continue "i actually have 2 sisters, i'm the middle child. my older sister was my support, she didn't think i was a freak, she actually adored me so much that my parents didn't let me talk to her when she went to college. soon enough after i left they started to come around for little parts of my life but i don't make it a priority for them to be in my life after everything " i said and felt myself get a bit down "have you talked to your sister" she asked me and i shook my head "i found out i have a nephew and a niece" i smiled widely at the thought "i'm just, ugh, i'm just scared to see family again, i haven't seen my parents in like a year" i opened up and she nodded "what about your younger sister" she asked "oh she hated my guts, she took after my parents. when they would lock me in my room she would help them torcher me but she was only 7 at the time" i told her "baby you're so strong, i hope you know that" she kissed my cheek and lips "i think i just go through whatever and try my best to be strong" i shrugged and kissed her. we got into a heated make out session "mmm" she hummed and caressed my face, i grabbed her waist and pushed her down on my stomach. she bit my lip and smiled. she kinda just sat and inspected my face with a smile "you're so sexy" she said and we attacked eachothers lips. she pulled away after 6 minutes of an intense make out session "hey i'm really happy you felt comfortable enough to share that with me" she said and i kissed her nose "i literally havent shared that with anyone but that felt good to get off my chest" i told her and she smiled "thank you for listening" i added and she stuffed her face in my neck. "you're incredible" she told me and i giggled "look who's talking" i said and rubbed her back. it got quiet until i heard her yawn "go to sleep pooh, i'll see you after my appointment" i told her and kissed her forehead "goodnight baby" she kissed my neck "goodnight" i said and drifted off into an amazing sleep.
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a/n: shitty chapter but gn
(just edited some stuff)