2gether AU: Stay, be Still

Chapter 13: Running Away

Tine's POV

Once again, I woke up from the nightmare at 3 f'cking am.

I struggled to take in fresh air to calm my protesting lungs. I felt the burn in my lungs.

Sarawat was sleeping soundly beside me, his lips curled into a small pout and his expressions softened, as if he was a fallen angel.

The same chrysanthemum field came back and haunted me again.

But, this time, I was left all alone in the yellow, dewy field. Sarawat wasn't with me in my dreams.

What was that all about?

I remember the burning sensation at the bottom of my heart in my dreams and I woke up with hot tears sprawling across my face.

I tasted a tang of metallic, salty taste in my mouth, I must've bitten my lips so hard until they bled while suppressing my screams just now.

Wat, how could I face my deepest fear when you are the fear that I am aching to run away from?

///

I was taking a bite of my chicken sandwich as I stared into the skyline of Bangkok from my office, the morning sun layering the buildings in a yellow shade.

However, I felt suffocated, cold and hollow from within. My fear was consuming me.

Lately, I had been avoiding Sarawat deliberately.

I would either have too many papers waiting for me to finish urgently, or I would have a sudden legal consultation scheduled right before I left my office.

Or perhaps, I had purposely turned my schedule around, so that I could go home later than usual.

How am I supposed to look into that pair of eyes without allowing my mind from drowning in bitterness? 

To: Fong [09:38]

Are you free tonight? What about a drink?

I took another bite of my sandwich as I waited for Fong's reply.

From: Fong [09:40]

Just got off from my night shift, I'll see you for dinner tonight, no alcohol.

Fine.

Before I could stand up and throw the sandwich package away, my phone buzzed and I picked it up without looking at the caller ID, assuming it was Fong.

"Ai'Fong, it's not even 10 in the morning, it's still not time for dinner yet." I joked half-heartedly.

"Baby, it's me."

This isn't Fong's voice.

I pulled my phone away from my left ear, my heart ached at the sight of the name that once brought rainbows to my life.

"Wat." I whispered back shakily.

I buried my fingers into my hair, not minding the mess I might leave behind later.

"Are you coming back late again tonight?"

Sarawat sounded like he would break down if I said 'yes' to the question.

He had done nothing wrong, yet he was bearing all the costs of my demonic thoughts.

"I'll come back as soon as I finish dinner with Fong. I promise."