It was around 10 am when Stevie, Lindsey and the kids left the hospital.
Kristen had died that very night. She had just closed her eyes and fallen to sleep surrounded by her loved ones. All of her three children had lain for hours beside their dead mother, had hugged her lifeless, small body and cried. Stevie, Lindsey and Kristen's mother Diane had tried their best to calm them down. It had all felt like a terrible nightmare but it was reality.
Stella had held onto her mother's body, desperately crying and not wanting to let go of her.
Lindsey had to carry her out of the room after hours, so they all could get home to get some rest.
Stevie and Diane accompanied Lindsey to his house where they all again tried to soothe the kids. It was impossible.
Stella was screaming and crying non-stop and Lindsey had wrapped his arms around her until she fell asleep in his lap. Will had just disappeared upstairs into his room, he had needed space and Leelee and her grandmother went after some time upstairs to sleep together in one bed, desperately holding onto each other.
Stevie joined Lindsey on the couch and he brought later on Stella upstairs to bed.
Back in the living-room, Lindsey sat down next to Stevie on the couch where he totally fell apart. Somehow, Stevie managed to drag him into a lying position, so she could put a blanket over him and join him. He had been so strong for his children the whole day and now he couldn't hold it back any longer.
She wrapped her arms around his shaking body and held him close to her.
"I am here..", she said softly and stroked his chest, "I am so proud of you.. Linds, you are so strong.."
He just cried even heavier, turned around and buried his face in her long hair. It was heartbreaking.
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The following days went by and still it all felt like some bad dream. The kids didn't go to school, they just weren't capable of doing so. Stevie and Diane had stayed at the house since Kristen's death to help Lindsey with the kids, the household and the funeral. Stevie was amazed by how strong Diane was. She cried a lot, of course, but she kept fighting and was wonderful with her grandchildren and very nice to Stevie. She had imagined it could get rough with Kristen's mother but Diane had told her that she and Kristen had talked about her and Lindsey and that she was fine with it because her daughter had been as well. That helped a lot. No one was interested in any more drama. Their current situation was hard enough already.
Will had disappeared for a few days to meet his girlfriend. He needed to get out of the house and he reminded Stevie a lot of a younger version of Lindsey. Will was very sensitive and emotional, just like Lindsey when Stevie had met him 40 years ago, it was hard for him to show his true feelings and he always wanted to escape serious conversations.
Leelee had tried her best to cope with the situation. She seemed to be the sensitive one. She was very quiet and shy. She and Stevie got along quite well, the girl had always loved her, but she mostly clung to her grandmother.
And then there was Stella. The youngest of the three Buckingham children. She was completely devastated and overwhelmed by the whole situtation. She could barely rest, so Stevie and Lindsey had taken turns in lying down with her and holding her until she fell asleep.
Stevie had called Karen to cancel every single meeting she had. She wasn't interested in working at all. Lindsey needed her more than ever. At night, he clung to her for dear life that it nearly hurt which made it hard for her to fall asleep but she wouldn't want it any other way. Right now, she was the only support that he had and she wanted nothing more than to be there for him and make him feel better.
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It was the third night after the funeral, twelve days after Kristen's death, when Diane left the house for the very first time and Stevie and Lindsey were alone at home with the kids. The atmosphere was still tense and gloomy and Stevie couldn't really imagine how this was ever going to change.
When her mother Barbara had died she had fallen into a deep depression for months, unable to find any reason for leaving her house. But her mother had been over 90 years old, she had lived a long life full of love and happiness. Kristen on the other hand, had still been way too young to go.
Will planned on leaving for college soon. He had found an apartment near his campus and wanted nothing but escape the house. It seemed as if he couldn't bear staying here any longer. It hurt him badly.
Lindsey had not yet come up with an idea what to do with all of Kristen's clothes and things. They had left her bedroom as it had been, so the kids and Diane could walk in there and grieve properly.
Stevie didn't know how their future was going to look like. Right now, things were going really badly for each of them. Everyone was overwhelmed by grief and Lindsey's and Stevie's daily routine consisted mostly out of making calls to insurance companies, running the household and spending time with talking to the girls to comfort them. It was intense and exhausting just as Lindsey had predicted it but Stevie was certain to push through and keep going. She had made a promise and she was going to keep it.
Lindsey and Stevie had not talked about their relationship yet. She just stayed and he accepted her help gratefully. He had no idea how to handle it all on his own. Except of holding onto her at night, they didn't kiss or touch at all. He was just completely overwhelmed by what was going on around him and she tried to help him as much as possible.
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Another week went by and Stevie had just slipped under the covers of Lindsey's bed when he came out of the bathroom and joined her.
"Hey..", he smiled sadly at her and tried to meet her eyes.
"Hey.."
"Steph?"
"Mmmm?", she looked up at him.
"I want to thank you."
"What for?"
"What for?!", he repeated her answer, "For.. for everything! You've been so wonderful to me, to the kids, to Diane.. You've been such a great help and completely selfless. You haven't complained once since all of this happened.. You've been.. Just amazing.. And I couldn't have done any of it without you. I am so grateful to have you here with me. You're a true angel.. And I am so sorry I haven't given you much attention lately.. You don't deserve that... I just love you so much.."
She felt her heart melting by his words. It felt so good to hear him saying that. She couldn't deny how much she had missed his attention, his love, even though she knew how occupied he had been.
"Thank you, Linds.. That means a lot..", she said softly, smiled at him and placed a kiss on his knuckles, "I'm happy I could help you.."
They looked at each other and she wasn't sure where exactly they were standing right now.
"Come here", he said and wrapped his arm around her.
She snuggled happily in his strong arms. It felt so good to talk to him again. He pulled her closer and kissed her forehead.
"I am so blessed to have you here with me.."
She smiled and switched off the lights.
"I love you, Lindsey."
"I love you, too, Steph. More than you'll ever know!"
