jisung is an average high school student who has a hopeless crush on his fellow classmate minho and he only gets to talk to him during english class
excerpt:
«Jisung knew it was dumb to get his hopes up everytime he made eye contact with Minho or wh...
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«You were about to go home.» Minho was the one to break the silence during which the both of them have just been staring at each other, the smile not leaving his lips.
Jisung felt warm and bubbly all over and his heart was beating at an insane pace, but for once it wasn't out of nervousness or anxiety; it felt good - and as cheesy as it sounded - he felt butterflies in his stomach, there was simply no other way to describe that amazing feeling. His gaze was still fixed on Minho and he couldn't stop himself from blushing, especially when Minho pointed out that he had wanted to leave.
«You- you made it a little hard to do that now.» The younger shyly confessed, yet feeling a little more confident after what happened. He earned a soft chuckle from Minho in response. «Do you want me to walk you home?» The older detached his right hand from Jisung's waist and instead gently placed it on the boy's cheek, Jisung unconsciously leaning into the cool touch, almost closing his eyes.
«No, no, it's fine. I- just-» A random wave of embarrassment overcame Jisung and he didn't even know why, but he cleared his throat and finally tore his eyes off Minho. «God, you're so cute.» The blond cooed at Jisung's sudden shyness and embarrassment as he eventually let go of him. «I'll see you at school tomorrow?» That brought Jisung's attention back to the older's face, a mix of surprise and confusion in his expression. «Uh, yeah. Yes, sure!» He replied a little to excitedly, only to want to die out of embarrassment again. Minho on the other hand seemed to find it amusing whenever Jisung started blushing and acting flustered.
«Good.» Was everything Minho said before Jisung finally opened the door and left, conscious of the fact that the older watched his every move with a smile.
At home, Jisung could barely fall asleep - again. It was after he had met up with Minho again. However, this time he wasn't laying awake in his bed, staring at his ceiling in despair, wondering about what Minho's intentions were and why he had done what he had done. This time Jisung laid on his bed, cuddled up in his blanket and smiling to himself like he'd gone mad. But he couldn't help it - he was just so overwhelmed and happy that he couldn't fall asleep. Not even the fact that he had to go to school tomorrow made him strengthen his attempt to fall asleep. It only made him remember that he'd see Minho again.
The brunet bit his lower lip, happily cuddling up closer to his blanket that he was hugging. He still couldn't believe that his long time crush Minho had actually kissed him. Voluntarily. What were the chances? Minho, a boy, had kissed Jisung, another boy. That thought, though, suddenly made Jisung's smile drop.
Minho had kissed him. As in a real kiss that usually a boy and girl shared, yet the two of them kissed as two boys. The fact itself didn't bother Jisung, but he got anxious about society's view on homosexuality. Every now and then he had to remember that in South Korea, it was a huge obstacle being gay - or even bisexual for that matter. People didn't speak about, they thought it wasn't right from the beginning. And the few that openly stood up for it, trying to normalize same-sex love, they just weren't enough.
Once again, Jisung started worrying about his future, and he best wanted to slap himself for going from happy thoughts about Minho to this. How was he supposed to ever live a happy life if he couldn't even openly be together with the person he'd love one day? Would he inevitably have to marry a girl after all and pretend that he loved her so society wouldn't judge him? Jisung felt sick at that thought and cursed his country's conservative view on these kind of topics. Hell, Jisung hasn't even come out to his parents, how would he ever be able to come out to the whole world? The boy was at the verge of tears after turning a happy incident into something painful.
Jisung screwed his eyes shut, yet opened them again when, out of nowhere, his phone rang - someone was calling him. Who in the world would be calling him in the middle of the night? Lazily, he lifted his upper body to reach his phone and look at the bright display with squinted eyes.
Minho.
Minho was calling him again, making the day feel even more like that day before he'd been ghosted. Even if the series of events weren't quite the same, Jisung managed to feel crappy at the end of the day. Nevertheless, he hesitantly picked up the phone, lifting it to his ear and mumbling a quiet ‹Hi›.
When Minho's soothing voice reached Jisung's ears, he surprisingly started feeling a little more at ease. Something about it just helped him relax. «Hey, didn't wake you, did I?» The older chuckled at the end of his question, probably recalling the last time he'd called Jisung as well. Jisung shook his head no, then remembering that Minho couldn't see him, and quickly attaching a simple ‹No, couldn't sleep›.
«Yeah, me neither...» There was a short silence as Jisung didn't know what to reply and because it sounded like Minho hadn't finished his sentence.
«...couldn't stop thinking about you.» Minho sounded the slightest bit embarrassed as he said that, but he still managed to make Jisung blush madly and almost completely forget his previous thoughts. Yet he still didn't know what to reply. Was he supposed to say it back? It wouldn't be a lie after all. Jisung had been thinking about Minho which was the cause of his sleeplessness.
«O-oh, me neither...» he quietly said, knowing that Minho was probably smiling at that, at having gotten Jisung flustered again. There was silence again and Jisung could only hear his own heart beat, making him realize how much he actually liked Minho.
«Hey, we both should probably at least try to sleep. We've got school tomorrow.» Minho laughed tiredly, ending their silence which had seemed to last an eternity. «Yeah...» Jisung agreed, laying down backwards on his back, phone still by his ear.
«So...good night, sleep well, Jisung.» Minho added, waiting for Jisung to say the same to him, and then they both hung up. The brunet put his phone back on his nightstand and draped his blanket back over his body, hugging the upper part of it as a smile found its way back to his lips.
Maybe it would work out some day.
☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️
me vs not updating in the middle of the night
for someone who's majoring in english studies my english skills do suck for sure
i hope everyone's happy🤍 don't let anyone or anything get you down!! and always remember: you're the only one you'll always have
