Wasted Chances

34

Donny's POV

"First name basis na kayo?"

"Big deal? As far as I know magkaibigan kami. Aloof ka lang kaya lahat tawag sayo Pangilinan. Katakot ka kasi."

"Bakit ikaw? Natakot ka din ba sakin? Eh kinuya mo nga agad ako eh."

"Lumalayo tayo sa pagsagot sakin ng tanong eh. Bakit nga isasama si Ricci?"

"Sagutin mo yon tapos sasagutin ko na tanong mo."

"Hindi. Why would I? Alam ko magkakasundo tayo the moment we met. Saka I have no choice din naman kasi tayo talaga magkakasama palagi. Actually, natakot ako sa sarili ko na baka di ko mapigilan mahulog sayo kaya kinuya at kinaibigan kita. You're an ideal guy Donny, in case you're not aware. I can vouch na most of the girls here wanted to have you."

She called me by my name. She called me Donny. Hindi kuya but Donny. And what she have said stunned me. What the heck Shar?!?! Where the hell did you get that guts to say those? Where was that guts before Janina? Why only now?

"I'll let that pass for now, pero we have to have that talk na iniwasan ko before." sabi ko at sinagot na ang tanong nya.

Kung ako lang, gusto ko kami lang talaga ni Shar. Primarily because I want to test myself. Have I moved on already? Si Janina na ba talaga ang mahal ko?

Just when I thought yes, saka naman nangyari ito. Sharlene San Pedro, wala sa hulog ang timing mo. Why did you have to say those ngayon? Pinapagulo mo ang isip ko. The way you talk parang wala ka ng reservation. Or is the other way around? Is it you who already moved on kaya you can talk about your feelings freely?

That thought never leave me until our inuman session. Hindi pa nakatulong ang mga sagot ni Rivero sa tanong ni Janina. Mas hindi nakatulong na tahimik lang si Shar.

The only consolation I got siguro that night was when Shar looked at me and saw me smile, I saw a glimpse of sadness. I am not an overthinker but I will be this time. Was she not expecting that? Baka naman meron pa. Baka pwede pa. Because one thing's for sure. I am not over her yet. I still like her. I still love her. We need to talk. We have to have that talk. By all means, I need to talk to her.

Gag* and siraulo ako for saying those while Im with Janina pero part naman ng usapan namin yon. She knew na ganito pwede maging outcome. We both knew the situation back then. The only question remains is kung pano ko sasabihin kay Janina? Kung kelan?