Chemistry (Otis Milburn)

62

We rode the limousine to the award show together. Otis and Nick were dressed up in designer tuxedos while I had on a flared lavender dress with silver pumps. I felt absolutely glamorous, as if I could step on anyone who tried to come my way. Unstoppable. I went from wearing a long hospital gown to a designer dress and from grippy hospital socks to 4-inch pumps and was on my way to an award show. I deserved to romanticize my progress for a moment. Of course, none of it would have been possible without Nick and Otis. Shit, if it wasn't for Nick, my life was over on the second floor of his guest bedroom. 

The limousine pulled in right behind another limousine. Paparazzi saw us and rushed over, ready for us to step out. I quickly turned to Otis, who was staring directly at them. "You got this!" I whispered to him before we stepped out. Nick went first as he helped me step out next, then Otis.

We made our way down the red carpet, stopping for pictures behind the photo backdrop. Hundreds of cameras began flashing as I didn't know which one to look at first. Nick and I had our moment and took a photo together, and the photographers went crazy for it.

Watching Otis be completely starstruck over the other celebrities he saw was absolutely adorable. Knowing he was having a good time was what made me happy. He deserved it all. 

"Let's go sit down." Nick told us. "What time are you on?"

"I have to head backstage during the second commercial break." I took a deep breath. Saying it out loud made me more nervous than I was before. Nick grabbed my hand.

"You're going to be fine." 

The three of us went inside and looked for our seats. The seats were taped with our names on them.

"It says Otis! They know who I am." He laughed. His seat was next to mine.

"You're a star, Otis." I replied. I had the aisle seat, which was perfect. I needed the room for my dress. 

As more guests walked in, they began to acknowledge me and said hello. Others told me they were proud of me. Even celebrities I didn't know knew who I was were approaching me. 

"They all know you and you didn't tell me?" Otis leaned over and whispered.

"I didn't think they'd even know I existed. The tweet, Otis. Remember?" 

"Right.." 

My heart began racing once the show started. I kept rehearsing what I was going to say in my head repeatedly so I didn't screw up. I was so confident about my choice of speech that I was only worried I was going to run out of time rather than worry about what others thought of me. It was finally time to make a decision for myself, for my happiness. 

The first commercial break rolled around as more guests came by and greeted me. Some who also knew Nick greeted Otis as well, which he was living for. His eyes lit up every time they reached over to hug him after hugging Nick and I. 

Each presenter received about 45 seconds before presenting their award to say their scripted punch line that is supposed to be funny, even though we all know they're not. I was really hoping Nick's name was on the envelope. I wanted him to win more than ever. 

***

After another round of unfunny jokes, performances, wins and losses, it was time for the second commercial break. I was a nervous wreck. 

"You're going to be fine. You know what you're doing." Nick told me." 

I got up and headed towards backstage. 

This is it.