Crimson Madness #1 ⚖️: Commencement || SVT CRIME AU

26: The Trauma that it Left Behind

Nari's POV

   I remember when I discovered philosophy, I was fascinated by the latter which led me to discovering stoicism. It was a concept wherein you practice being firm and strong amidst trials and accept it as fate while still finding silver lining in every situation.

   Some people misunderstood the concept of stoicism, thinking of it as being a cold person and such, but it's all about acceptance and finding good in bad. It was a really good concept in philosophy which I've been trying to practice.

   And you know what else I discovered? I am NOT a person of stoicism at all.

   Everything that just happened to me is driving me crazy and it felt like, sooner or later I might burst or what. It appears that I still haven't move on from my mother's death, too although it's been six years.

   I still haven't accepted the fact that she's dead nor the fact that my dad is a corrupt lawyer.

   All these bullshits are driving me insane.

   "Nari,"

   "Nari,"

   "Nari," I got back to my senses when I heard Mingyu rose his tone.

   "Hey, class is over,"

   "Y-Yeah, right," I held my books in my arms and stood up, immediately; rushing to leave the campus.

   Ever since I came here this morning, I felt paranoid. I couldn't even walk by the local hood without feeling anxious and feeling like everyone's looking at me, or someone's following me.

   "Hey Nari," Mingyu called me again, and I didn't spare him any attention.

   "Nari, please,"

   "Why won't you talk to me since morning?" He asked he blocked my way. I held my books in my arms, hugging them close to my chest as I bit my bottom lip.

    "Nari, I've been worried about you. I talked to your dad to ask where you are because you won't answer my call and I was asto—"

   "Mingyu, please," I halted him from talking as I didn't want to reminisce what happened days ago.

   "L-Let's not talk about this, I beg you,"

   "Give me some space...please," I muttered in a hesitant manner.

   "I-yeah, sure. Wh-Whenever you're ready," there was a hint of sadness in his tone as he pursed his lips and looked at me with eyes full of sympathy.

   "I-I'll...see you around," I immediately walked past him.

***

   As soon as I hopped inside the car, I asked Jihoon to bring me to the cemetery where my mom was buried. I want to be with her and the least I could do, is to be by her grave.

   "Hey mom," I muttered as I stood in front of her grace.

   "Guess what, my month has been crazy,"

   I stuffed both of my hands inside the pockets of my coat. "Dad got shot on his leg, I'm living with seven strangers, got abducted and now I'm here,"

   I chuckled, bitterly. "With a fucking trauma all because of dad's illegal bullshits," I felt tears streaming down, uncontrollably, on my cheeks.

   "I'm exhausted, mom, so so damn exhausted. I wish you were here because things would've been different, right? Right mom?" I wiped off my tears as I sobbed.

   The cold breeze of wind, blew against my face as dry leaves tumbled on the ground, making rustle sounds due to its hardness. "I just want to be with you mom like I miss you so damn much,"

   "I miss you,"

Narrator's POV

When Nari came home, she went straight to her room and refused to talk to anyone else even to her father who visited. She just locked herself up in her room, burying herself with the workload she's got to do for law school.

Nari just sat in front of her desk with her school works, scattered. She would take a break from time to time by just napping, but it's mostly tearing up which resorts her to reviewing again.

Even when dinner came, she refused to go out of the room. The seven men have finished dinner, and now they're just doing some meetings with a bottle of wine.

"All we have to do is offer a meeting to reconciliate and clear out the misunderstandings, but if they refuse to...well, I gave them a fair warning," Seungcheol shrugged his shoulders as he took a sip of his wine.

   Seungcheol thinks that both of his right hand's advice are right, he should've never killed the two guys in such impulsive manner. He didn't want to admit his mistake which is why he plans to set up a meeting with the acting boss to reconciliate.

"Typical Cheol," Jeonghan scoffed.

"Are you going to release your wrath again? I'm looking forward to it," Junhui raised his glass of wine for a toss, but none of them complied to him. Instead, they gave him a look which made Junhui roll his eyes.

"Ya'll are no fun," he groaned as he gulped down the liquor.

"Anyways, as I was saying," Seungcheol trailed off.

"Mujin's men will get a taste of their own medicine if they wouldn't want to negotiate in such thorough manner," Seungcheol justified his actions.

"Also, Mujin's son whom is the head now, is clearly nothing but a dumb son of a bitch who's always high on crack and just tattles because of arrogance," Seungcheol added as he took out a cigarette to smoke.

"Well, if he doesn't want to negotiate. How about we lay low for a bit? And then attack?" Jeonghan suggested.

"If we do that, he might pull a bold stunt again. Wouldn't that be a 2-0?" Seungcheol raised an eyebrow at Jeonghan who fell into silence.

He smirked before saying. "I know you don't like losing, Han," he grinned as Jeonghan rolled his eyes.

"Our utmost priority right now is Nari's safety. Here's the things guys, the girl's studying law and it's tough to be on the last year—it's crucial," he explained.

"As much as possible, don't let her know that," he trailed off.

"We're probably on the edge of a cliff and it might stress her out even more," the meeting room became silent since it's pretty obvious that Nari's in a tough situation.

Right after the meeting, they all went to their rooms to rest except for Jeonghan who prepared a meal and made his way to Nari's room. He hesitated for a bit as he held the tray, facing the front door. He bit the inside of his cheek as he put down the tray of food on the floor, in front of her door.

He stifle a sigh as he knocked on the latter before leaving. He felt bad for her although he still kind of resent her for the arguments they had.

Nonetheless, Jeonghan finds himself still caring for her.