Rip - Becoming Whole

Progress

So Rip started therapy.

"Oh,nonononono. Out of the question," the therapist told him, when Mr Dutton rang her on the evening before Rip's second session with her to say that he was thinking of cancelling. "We got him thus far. Sure, isn't that when he needs us most," she told Mr Dutton, almost scolding him, her words echoing what Samuel has told him so often before.

They had stayed the week at the campsite near the summer pastures with the crew from their ranch, but it hadn't gone well so far. Rip's nightmares had hit an all-time high there, he told her. It took him hours to fall asleep now as well and Mr Dutton was wondering if he was trying to keep himself awake to avoid the nightly terrors or maybe the embarrassment of everyone in the campsite being privy to them.

He had assumed that the break from school and the constant texting with his friends of late, would have a calming effect. He had hoped the hard work in the fresh air and in the saddle, going back to the basics of cooking over an open campfire and being exposed to the raw elements, would help Rip's appetite the way it always did his, but the opposite was the case.

Rip was downhearted, irritable and argumentative with everyone. In hindsight he told her he should have known. He'd taken him away from his routine and safe space. He was ready to give up and considered spending yet another summer on the ranch with the boy. It's not as if he is not on the fresh air there just as much.

The therapist suggested to play it by ear, and not to rescue him right away. A little bit of a challenge might not be a bad thing, she felt, especially if it was coupled with a lot of emotional support. "You are his safe space, John," she told him.

"He has his own tent," Mr Dutton replied when she enquired about the sleeping arrangements in the campsite.

"Hm," she went "is there a chance that sleeping by himself in a tent is what is unsettling him? Is he not normally sharing with your son Robert? Maybe he feels a bit vulnerable in a tent by himself? It doesn't exactly offer much in way of protection. How well does he know the other men?" she asked.

Mr Dutton went quiet.

"Mr Dutton?" the therapist called quietly.

It had entered his mind, but he had dismissed it. The boy might be frightened alone in his tent, but he was certain he would be just as uncomfortable sharing it with one of them, for the obvious reason.

He knew he should tell her, but also knew that Rip would have conniptions if he did and found out. And then there was that small matter of having hung the bastard who did it. They covered their tracks, he was certain of that, and around here no one would dig too deep if anyone started to suspect foul play in relation to the disappearance of an animal like him. He could avert it, or better said, Jamie could. 'Around here, they'd dig deeper if you'd killed a bear,' he mused. No, he wasn't worried for himself, but for Rip having to go through the ordeal of having to answer questions to the police. He hadn't thought about this when he encouraged him to do therapy. Would she have to report it if the boy told her he was raped? Surely if she thought the man was still alive, she would. They hung him not just because of the crime he committed but also because of the danger he posed to others. At least that is what they had told themselves at the time. He would have to find out how far this confidentiality lark really went. He'd need to talk to Samuel about it. He'd need to be discreet though. Samuel had a sixth sense for this kind of thing. He could smell deceit a mile off, he mused.

"They don't share a bedroom but share something like an apartment. Their bedrooms are connected," he replied coldly, only answering part of the question she asked.

She sensed his reluctance to speak freely and was wondering if he would find the thought of sharing his tent with the boy uncomfortable. He came across as someone safe but maybe he was prudish or concerned about how it may look. Nowadays this was frowned upon, and rightly so but it also stopped children like Rip getting what they needed from their carers. She had strong feelings on the subject of safe and appropriate touch. She didn't want to suggest it to him though if it wasn't an option, he was willing to consider. It would only make him feel inadequate or guilty. They didn't know each other well enough yet.