It All Started With a Diary

yours

WARNING: chapter contains mature scenes!!

"You drew stars around my scars." – Taylor Swift
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Chapter 70
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I stood in the mirror, observing myself over for the millionth time. Raven was right, this did look amazing.

The lingerie was a lace, pale pink set. I worried that it wouldn't match what Raven promised, but it did that and more. It hugged my curves in the best way possible.

While I was in here, I applied Kade's favorite scent, as well as light makeup Raven packed. Even though she and Jax had gone overboard with their instructions, they both knew what they were talking about, that was for sure.

I smoothed my shaky hands across my thighs, swallowing down the tight knot in my throat. The scars were still there. Not as noticeable, but there nonetheless. I tried to breeze past my insecurities since Kade already saw me naked, but old habits die hard.

I turned to face the door. Every step I took seemed to edge me closer and closer to reality. This was going to happen. Tonight.

My clammy hand grabbed, and twisted the doorknob. Nerves knocked my stomach around, before I finally grew the courage to step through.

Since we had moved from the main room to the bedroom, I was right where I needed to be. But Kade wasn't here.

"Sweetheart, are you hungry?" he was saying from another room, his footsteps following after him. "Grandma went grocery shopping and stocked us up on pizza rolls and—" His words ceased as soon as he stepped into the room.

Shit, shit. I wasn't in the right part of my plan. I planned to be in the bed when he walked in, but instead I was still standing. But Kade didn't seem to mind.

His hand raked over his mouth as he stepped closer to me with widened eyes. "Shit..."

I grimaced. Fuck. This was going wrong. I spent all night planning, but now one step ruined it.

Kade's hand fell as he examined my body. His eyes searched every corner of me he could before he took me by surprise. One minute he was a couple feet away, and the next, he was gathering me up.

I yelped as he grasped me by the waist, and practically tossed me on the bed in the most gentlest way possible. There was no hesitation as his body and lips fell on mine.

The kiss broke before he went to my neck. "Sweetheart, are you trying to drive me fucking crazy?" My lips parted for a choked breath as he trailed kisses down my neck. "You are. You must be."

I had to snap myself out of it to tell him. I knew where he thought this was going. We only went as far as kissing, and him touching me, but we never fully went through with sex, before.

"Hold on." I groaned in frustration as I placed my hand on his chest. I was always mush under him. Against me, I could feel how hard his cock had gotten just at the sight of me. The thought made my stomach jump with anticipation.

His hooded eyes pressed me down into the bed. "Stop teasing me, sweetheart." To add to his frustration, he wrapped my legs around his waist, pressing his erection into me. The feeling left me yearning.

I wasn't sure how to confront it. Should I ease into it? Ask for it? That seemed desperate. Or should I just let it be casual? This seemed much easier when Raven described it.

Finally, my lips used their own mind. "I want you to have me." My body tilted off its axes as my skin warmed under him.

He tilted his head as he pushed the strands of hair out of my eyes. "What do you mean? Have you?"