Our Sinful Love | TaeGyu AU✔

"forever locked"

The air in the hospital was too heavy. The stale, chemical smell of sickness and death permeated every inch of his being, leaving no room for anything else. It clung to the fabric of his clothes, it lingered on his hair, it filled the room and made him feel claustrophobic. He hated the hospital. But then again, who wouldn't? All of this was happening because of him and he couldn't do shit about it. He had no control over his life right now. He wasn't sure why he even bothered coming here. He had no right to be here. He felt nothing but emptiness. He was scared and alone and it was all his fault.

Yeonjun was a calm person. It was very hard to push his buttons or annoy him to the point of tears. He rarely ever exploded, unless he was too provoked, but the previous night he went to the club to drink, all alone, so he would forget about his problems and every pain he had received from the people he loved the most. He got drunk. A lot drunk, to the point that he decided to go home in his car rather than taking a taxi, so he got into an accident and almost killed himself. Now as the doctors had announced, he was in a coma and Beomgyu was blaming himself for it all. He had done this to Yeonjun with his reckless behaviours. He had hurt him this much and now he could die at any moment because of his mistakes.

It was Yeonjun. His Yeonjun. His precious and lovely husband. How heartless Beomgyu must have been to have brought him to this state? How cruel Beomgyu had really been. He was angry now. Angry that everything had come to this because of him. Because he wasn't careful enough and hadn't taken care of his husband well enough. That's what everyone said anyways, they were supposed to take care of each other. Beomgyu was supposed to protect Yeonjun, but instead, he failed him. Why wasn't he more careful and less selfish?

"Honey", Beomgyu heard Jiwoo call as she seated herself beside him, causing the boy's tired and red-rimmed eyes to fix on her.

Jiwoo was at her parents' house by that time they called her from the hospital and told her about Yeonjun. She was crying when she arrived at the hospital after hearing the news. She couldn't bear the idea of losing her son, her first child, her first sunshine, though she wasn't losing hope. She kept saying that she wanted to be there when Yeonjun woke up, so she was going to stay there all days and nights... Maybe her son wouldn't feel afraid or alone if she was there, close to him. No one knew whether Yeonjun would actually wake up or not, but Jiwoo was a mother, she didn't have the right to lose hope and give up this easily. She could wait for ages if she had to.

"Yeah?", Beomgyu answered in an exhausted tone, his voice hoarse from so much crying.

"It's been more than a day you're here. You look very tired", Jiwoo said softly, her voice was laced with a lot of affection and care, "Go, find Taehyun and return home with him, okay?"

Her words made Beomgyu a bit heavier. The reason Yeonjun was lying unconscious in the reanimation was him, yet his mother treated him like her own son and cared so much about him. It made Beomgyu feel incredibly uncomfortable. Not the physical kind of discomfort, it was the emotional kind. It was the kind of discomfort that made his chest ache and made him want to scream in frustration and anger, but also feel grateful at the same time. It felt like being trapped. Like something was holding him down, suffocating him in unbearable darkness.

"I want to be here", he muttered weakly, lowering his gaze in shame and guilt, "When he wakes up, I want to be here"

Jiwoo's expression changed into the very pained one this time, her face crinkling into a frown as she leaned closer to touch the boy's hair, gently caressing him, "I know you're very sad and scared, honey", she said softly, causing Beomgyu to close his eyes for a moment, so he could push back his tears, "I know you're scared for his life and hurting too much, but being here will change nothing. You need to get rest. I'll stay here with him and contact you immediately if he wakes up, okay?"