Tainted | Hannibal Lecter

6. Therapy

"Before we get started, i want to formally introduce you all to Madison Marshall. I hope everyone will make her feel welcome."
The psychiatrist said as she sat among the girls in a circle.

She was older, much older, and you knew just by looking at her that she held a sort of maturity and intelligence that you wish of having one day. Her voice was calming and soothing, it made everyone who had the privilege of hearing it feel safe.

All 7 girls surrounding her gave her a glare that made her want to run in the other direction. Lucy, who sat next to her, noticed that Madison had zoned out so she placed her hand on Maddison's knee and leant towards her.

"I think you should say something"
She whispered and giggled quietly

Madison snapped out of her locked stare and instantly looked over to Lucy. The woman had noticed this interaction and took a mental note of Madison's tendency to lose focus.

"Oh, sorry. It's nice to meet you all."
She tried to present a polite smile but it faded quickly.

"Madison, this is a safe space. We all want you to know that whatever you say, stays in this circle."

These words comforted Madison, she quickly felt more at peace with sharing her story.

"Would you like to tell us a bit about yourself and why you are here?"

Madison nods and then looks down at her hands. As she becomes more nervous she finds herself wishing for Hannibal to be by her side, holding her hands and telling her it'll be okay.

"I'm Madison and i'm Twenty. I'm here because i recently survived an attempted murder. My parents weren't as 'lucky' as i was, i heard them being murdered in another room."

Her emotionless voice shocked a few of the other girls.
A few of them exchanged glances and others just stared at her in shock.

When Madison finally looked up she was met with sympathetic expressions. She thought she might have seemed crazy to say all of that and not let out a single tear, but in all honesty, she was just numb to it all. Of course she missed her parents deeply and would do anything to get them back, but she was numb to telling the story. It had almost become rehearsed, as if she was telling a fictional story.

"Thank you for sharing that, Madison. I know that must've been tough for you. And i understand it won't be easy to recover, but we will all be here on your journey."

It was sort of comforting knowing she had people supporting her, but it felt forced. I'll be there for you if you're there for me. She knew they didn't actually care for her, how could they? They've known her for a day. And Hannibal had said that every relationship is temporary, so why even bother trying to make friends if they won't last?

The lady didn't move her eyes from Madison as she got swept away in thought.

"Madison?"

When she didn't reply Lucy nudged her lightly.
Madison looked up in confusion.

"Where did you go?"
Asked the psychiatrist

"What? No where."

"Do you have any thoughts you'd like to share, perhaps how you're feeling at the moment?"

Madison gulped and took a deep breath. She knew what she wanted to say, but she just couldn't find the words to say it.

"I... i don't think i want to 'recover'. I find comfort in how i'm feeling. I know that what i'm experiencing is the result of my parents dying, and that validates my emotions. The more grief i feel, the closer i feel to them."