whatever the hell we want || j. jordan

~ chapter 5.1 ~

day of death wave

I eventually found Kane and demanded to know about Jasper. He'd made a good decision for once in his life and spared Jasper. He was still in medical, recovering. When I got to him he was definitely recovered, just being lazy. I explained everything to him and he was finally thankful for being alive. It's crazy, but I think the near death experience really made him change his mind about things. At least for the time being.

1 month after death wave

Jasper and I had chosen bunks next to each other because we had no family to share with. We were each other's family, even though we had a very long rough patch and it took us a while to find ourselves again.

Miller and his father were both still alive. Their bunks weren't near ours, guards and other necessary personnel were closer together. Jasper and I meant to spend the majority of our time together, planning on living life like it was the Ark and sneaking out after curfew and such. However, Octavia really cracked down when it came to rules. I suppose she had to, because she was in charge of 1,200 people.

We hardly found any time for each other between working at the hydrofarm and eating meals. And worst of all, we had Mount Weather style bunks. No privacy, many people were sleeping in one room full of bunk beds. When I say no privacy, I mean no privacy. And there weren't many maintenance closets either, so Jasper and I had to pull out all the stops to even see each other, other than at the cafeteria and before bed.

47 days after death wave

"The building has collapsed. We're not going anywhere." Miller said. We were sitting on my bed.

"What do you mean, 'we're not going anywhere'?"

"I mean, in five years, the building will still be collapsed and we are going to be stuck here, unless by some off chance Bellamy and the others come back from space and clear the building from the door."

I couldn't believe we didn't think of this. We were going to die in here. I suddenly couldn't breathe. I had to get to the hydrofarm and report for work, but I couldn't even think of anything. If I just skipped, would Kara even notice? I hated Kara. She was annoying and acted like she ran the place. She sort of did, because she oversaw everything at the farm, but I didn't like the way she acted about it.

I decided to skip it. People were fighting in the halls and everywhere else. Jasper had sobered up and was cleaning the kitchens from after breakfast because we had been caught out after curfew. I was cleaning the kitchens after lunch. They were determined to keep us from doing anything at the same time, worried we would slack off or something. Not that we wouldn't.

After a really fun hour of overthinking and internalizing and panicking, Miller and I went off to find Jasper for lunch. We all went down the line to get our meals then sat at our table. Usually Abby sat with Kane, but considering the discovery today, she was sitting with us. They'd gotten into a fight or something.

I poked at my lunch. "We're getting less food as the days go on, right? I've definitely lost weight."

"Yeah. They're rationing a lot now." Miller said.

"At least on the Ark we had windows," Jackson said, leaning back in his chair. He'd finished his food in less than five minutes. We were getting half a scoop of food now, so it didn't take long to get down.