A Frigid Wedlock(completed)✔

chapter 20.

Life was back to normal. Normal, as in,for everyone except Sana. Her commotions and restlessness were on an incrementation journey. She was living under constant turbulence and anxiety. Her thoughts were not ready escape her mind. At point, She felt as if she was reaching to a point of absolute nothingness. It was gaudging her every passing seconds. Though she seems normal to people around her but only a close source can magnificate the hidden turmoil of hers. She couldn't lay her mind on any particular thing, rather it kept flickering every minute from one impaired thought to the other unassertive one. Though she knew somewhere, that she was just being gloom ridden and pessimistic for no fatal reasons. But primitive anamolies of minds works like that only. We know how things should work but only on a wider picture. The minut deformities and problem effects us more intricately, and we let them do that to us.
Suddenly her maze of thought got disturbed with whistle of pressure cooker. She was standing in the kitchen, preparing breakfast for everyone! . Turning off the knob, she quickly placed it on the breakfast table.

"sidharth aaj PTA hai Aarav ka, aap half day le skte ho kya? "

"nhi yaar sana, ho ni payega... Manage na please. I'll take care next time pakka! " his wobbled mumching upon his idli.

"oh... Ok... But "

"Sana, get me a glass of water na, the chutney was too spicy. Literally,...uffff" his frequent and sharp intake of breaths were enough to convey how his tongue was on fire. She never make too much spicy food but now a days her absence of mind in the kitchen compelled her for such actions.

"sorry! jyada spicy ho gya aaj bhi kya?" she asked, giving him a glass of water.

"uhmm, shayad! I thinks the salt is too less thats why it feels high on spices. " he gulped down water like a fish.

"sorry, vo main keh rahi thi ke Aarav... " she started to say .

"mmm... Im getting late, shit damn, fuckk" looking at his wrist watch, he got off his chair, without paying much attention to what she was saying. Not his mistake! Last minutes of leaving for office , always goes in frenzy but she felt bad, everyone in the house have something to do and somewhere to go! That too in a hurry! And here she was, who had absolutely nothing to do of that sort, except all these household chores and that diurnal quintisencial regime of hers . A haggardious and prototypical life she was living.

" one more favor! Sorry main kaam badha ra hu tumhara " he said tying his shoe laces. "you don't have to be sorry sidharth.... Vaise bhi i don't have much to do after this.... Pura din aur karti hi kya hoon sivaye yahi sab roz ke kaam se! Btao kya kaam hai? " her voice had a tint of disappointment in it. He can sense that, actually he was been noticing her weirdness from the day he came back from Bangalore. He was constantly scruitizing her actions and gloomy mood. He was trying to churn the exact reason of her cynical behavior all by himself, because she was not letting him know about the things that were bothering her.

"vo, mera... My black coat, please usko dhund kar dryclean ke liya de dena... Kal meeting me i need to wear that. " he said witha hesitation, after listening her reply he became even more eager to know the exact reason of her plight.

"sure" she voiced typically.

"thanks " steeling a kiss , he took his bag and went outside. Taking a deep breath, she cleaned the table and put the dishes into the sink. Her heart was sinking. Tears started to brim in her eyes. And this aloofness was eating her now, this daily routine ,its awful for her. She stood there in the kitchen and cried her heart out. She can do that coz no one wae there to make a watch upon her. The lack of security and confidence upon herself was killing her and time was running out of her hands. She had to do something! Atleast she should talk to her husband. Otherwise, this guilt of not trying her best for the sake of her life and mental sanity would kill her everytime she would evaluate her life. And sidharth was an understanding and doting husband, she knew that. He was trying so hard to get things out of her. Still, if she was not reading to make a move and reavel her predicament before him, then she would be the one held responsible for the collapse. The ball was in her court, she had to make a move now. But how...!!