Tommyinnit // [ MCYT ] Angst Oneshots

stay with me [1]

Hello, before we begin here is some information + definitions of some things you may not know about it's very useful please read it, thank you :)

TRIGGER WARNINGS FOR THE WHOLE STORY:
-vomiting
-abuse
-self-harm
-panic attacks
-eating disorders
-death
-derealization*
-depersonalization*

CONTENT WARNINGS FOR THE WHOLE STORY:
-hospitals
-blood

. . .

*DEREALIZATION: feeling that your surroundings are not real

*DEPERSONALIZATION: feeling as if you're observing yourself from outside your body.

. . .

LANGUAGE: English UK

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Also, please vote it helps out a lot, and don't be afraid to comment! I love reading them :) Thank you so much for reading this, also I've made this incredibly angsty so enjoyyy <3

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< Tommys Pov >

I woke up in my bed, drenched in a cold sweat. I sat up, pushing my back against the wall. I started to get dizzy and lose focus. I pushed my pale hand into my messy blonde hair, holding my head as it started to hurt.

I slowly stood up, still holding my head. Oh god, what is happening? I opened the door as quietly as I could, and I took a peek downstairs. The house reeked of alcohol and cigarette smoke.

I felt a sharp pain in my stomach and held it, kneeling down in pain. My mouth started watering and the whole world felt like it was lagging. I got up and slid into the washroom, vomiting into the toilet.

Everything was dark, lit up only a little from the moon through the window. I looked up at the counter and it looked distorted. My head started pounding, I got up and turned on the water, splashing some in my face, then turning on the light, letting my eyes adjust.

I looked at myself in the mirror. Skinny, pale, with blue eyes. I looked at the sleeve of my grey Schlatt co jumper and slowly rolled up the soft material, revelling hundreds of self-harm cuts, scars, and a few bruises that laced my malnourished arms.

I watched as tears pricked my eyes. I let out a sob and held it again. The tears rolled down my cheeks, as I let out another sob. I backed up and felt the sobs get more and more frequent. I let myself fall to the floor as I started having a panic attack.

My hands were shaking, my head was pounding, I couldn't think straight.

I just wanted someone to be here for me.

I got up and held my breath, quickly going back to my room. I took out my phone and looked through discord, at the people that were online.

Wilbur.

I tried to call Wilbur but he didn't answer. That was probably my fault. I kept spamming him to try and get him to make a video with me but he was busy with something else. I tried again, and again, and again. He wasn't picking up.

I opened mine and his dm's and was about to say something but I heard my father's footsteps coming up the stairs. He was definitely drunk. He threw open the door, fear overtook me as I started breathing faster. I watched as he stumbled towards me. He was barely even standing.

My father punched me in the gut, and I almost threw up again. I started getting a little dizzy, as my father grabbed my arm tightly and pulled me forward.

"Listen here you child, I don't care about you. And look at you, you're so fucking fat I mean, how do you live with yourself..." He slurred. I could smell the alcohol on his breath.

He let go of my arms pushing me down to the ground. I hit my head on the corner of my bed and my ears started ringing. Father left the room, slamming the door behind him.

I started sobbing loudly and desperately reached for my phone and sat on my knees. I called Wilbur and he actually picked up this time.

"Tommy, I swear to god I'm busy right now I cant make a video with you." He sternly said, he almost sounded a bit angry.

"W-wil-bur, I-I... M-my head... H-help-" I let out before exploding into a coughing fit.

"Tommy? Holy shit what's going on?" He sounded terrified.

"I-I need help," I said, trying to suppress my coughing.

"You need to explain what's going on, and do I need to come to your house?" He asked, and at that moment, I heard the front door open and shut with a slam.

"Yes, p-please c-come-" I said.

"Alright, I-I'm coming, but it will take about 40 minutes... Do you think you can wait that long?." His voice shook a little.

"y-yes"

I felt my stomach turning and my mouth started watering again. I turned around grabbing the trashcan beside my bed. I set it down next to me and lied down on the floor, trying to breathe through the sobs.

"Tommy... P-please, stay with me." Wilbur said softly.

I quickly lifted myself up from the floor looking into the trash can. I put my hand on my head and felt a bit of warmth. I took my hand off and there was a little blood on it. I stared at my hand.

"M-my head is- is ble-eding..." I spoke.

"What? Tommy oh my god do not hang up," Wilbur said, "I'm just going to go over the speed limit and hope I don't get caught, tell me if you need to call 999."

"Ok," I said.

I leaned into the trash can and started coughing up whatever was left in my body. I hadn't even eaten anything in a while. If I did either my father would beat me again or I would end up just making myself throw it up because my father's words wouldn't leave my mind.

"Tommy I'm almost to your house, It'll be okay, just 10 more minutes," He said.

I tried to say something but I just ended up in a coughing fit. I lied back down, trying to stay awake, I need to stay awake, for Wilbur. I curled up into a ball and started sobbing again. I wanted to eat food so badly but I don't think I would be able to let myself.

"Alright, Tommy, I'm here."