Tommyinnit // [ MCYT ] Angst Oneshots

stay with me [9]

Tommy's pov

I looked at Wilbur. He looked at me. Wilbur didn't move, instead he looked angry... really angry.

"TOMMY WHY THE FUCK DID YOU- AAHHHGGGH" Wilbur screamed at me.

I sat in silence. He walked out and slammed the door. I quickly got up trying to apologize, throwing the door back open. Wilbur stomped down the stairs and made his way to Karl.

"KARL WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" Wilbur yelled.

"What?" Karl looked confused.

"YOU SHOULD BE WATCHING HIM," Wilbur was so angry... It's my fault.

"You know what... YOU CAN'T JUST FUCKING USE ME. IM NOT A FUCKING THERAPIST." Karl retorted.

"HE NEEDS SUPERVISION," Wilbur shouted.

"HE IS NOT A CHILD HE CAN HANDLE HIMSELF." Karl looked pretty mad as well.

"HE IS A CHILD."

My ears started ringing. Oh god... I'm going to get hurt. There's so much yelling... My father called me a child... I'm not a child- Im not... I started panicking, my breathing became uneven.

I watched as Wilbur and Karl fought. The ringing stopped and I could hear them shouting at each other. It's my fault. My fault. My fault. It's been my fault... since the beginning. I backed up and turned around running up the stairs.

I ran into the washroom and locked the door. I was breathing so quickly, I looked over into the mirror. It's not real. I'm not real. How am I even here? I looked down at my hands. They were shaking... I was shaking.

I started to feel lightheaded. I put my hands on the counter standing in front of the sink, holding myself up. I sobbed loudly. I felt myself spit up acid into the sink. My throat burned as I rubbed it. I fell backwards trying to control my breathing.

If I've ever needed Karl or Wilbur or anyone for that matter... It was now.

My eyes darted around the room. Everything suddenly looked bigger. I felt trapped. I quickly got up, feeling a wave of dizziness hit me. I held on to the doorknob, trying to open it. It wouldn't open. I struggled against the door. I screamed loudly, sobbing.

I was trapped in my fathers closet. Father said he'd let me out when I decided to be good. My whole body hurt from when he threw me onto the floor. I got up and tried opening the door, screaming for help, but nobody came. I was trapped.

I snapped out of the flashback, still trying to open the door. I fiddled with the lock and tried unlocking it. My sweaty hands kept slipping, and the fact they were shaking uncontrollably didn't help.

I hit the door in one last attempt to open it, and fell to my knees on the floor. It felt like the walls were closing in on me. I started coughing. I felt myself start throwing up all over the floor. In a panic, I grabbed the trash can from next to the toilet and threw up the tiny amount of food I had.

I looked at the mess. Oh my god help me. I started looking through the cabinets, trying to find a hand towel to clean up with, but I ended up coming across some razor blades first. I picked up one and broke it out of the packaging. My shaky hands rolled up my sleeve and I took the razor blade and tore through my skin.

Blood and vomit littered the floor. I finally calmed down and realized what I'd done. I dropped the blade, looking at my arm in shock. I felt myself begin to weep. I felt so overwhelmed... I just wanted to curl up into a ball and die.

I slowly and shakily pulled myself up with the counter and unlocked the door, throwing it open, finally getting out. I stepped out, almost falling over multiple times. I stood for a second, looking around, feeling at peace. The world fell silent.

Dizziness overtook me and I fell to the floor. I curled up into a ball and began sobbing again. I saw Karl emerge from the stairs with a worried look. He ran over to me. I saw him look into the washroom and his eyes widened.

"Oh gosh..."

He looked back down at me, turning over my arms revealing all the cuts that were still bleeding. Everything became blurry. My eyes started to feel heavy. Was I dying? I felt them close as the world became blank.

I woke up in my bed. I quickly shot up, feeling a headache slowly starting to appear. I looked around slowly turning my head, trying not to make my headache worse. I looked down at my arms and they were wrapped in bandages.

I slowly got up and walked to the doorway, holding onto it. I peeked around the corner and made my way downstairs.

I saw Karl sitting on the couch, staring at nothing. He looked so sad... I approached him and he still was staring off into space. I tapped his shoulder and he jumped.

"Oh- How are you feeling?" He asked me, putting on a smile.

"Terrible, so fuck off," I said flatly.

"Listen, I know we aren't really on good terms but I'm genuinely worried about you," he said sadly.

"Yeah ok," I said looking away.

I wasn't trying to hurt Karl, I was just so mad. I was mad at Wilbur but I was taking it out on Karl... This isn't right. I walked over to the couch, sitting next to him.

"Sorry... I-I'm just mad at Wilbur," I said.

"It's okay, I forgive you, but would you please tell me what happened back there?" Karl said looking into my eyes.

"A-alright..." I said, suddenly feeling sick.

I started coughing, spitting up blood all over myself.

"What the f-" I coughed again, "fuck-"