Multi fandom oneshots

Faye- pain in my ass.

I just wanted to write a piece where Faye annoys the reader really badly, idky I just did.

Published- 1-23-22
Words-1039
Not edited

Your pov-

I looked over at the blonde at the other side of the living room. Fez put me in charge of her, he's paying me 20 an hour and giving me free weed for doing this. Not like I don't already get free weed and stuff because I also run this business but it's a nice addition. Also
"Your just gonna watch me allll night?" Her words were slurred and her tone was annoyed.
"Yes." I nodded.
"Why? Just let me shoot up and I'll be outta your way." She stood up, I stood up with her blocking her from walking away.
"Sit. Down." I smiled and she crossed her arms with a huff,"sit down Faye."
"No, fuck you ." She sat down anyways,"fuck you, you're worst then the Ginger. Your probably sucking his dick for weed and pills."
"First off, That ginger is my brother, second, I don't take pills." I walked into the kitchen,"tea?"
"Fine, black with sugar."  My back was turned to her and I heard the couch raise.
"Sit down Faye. I raised Ash and looked after my brother when he had memory loss, you cant run away or try to shoot up, I'll hear it." I looked back at and she laid down onto the couch.
"Ugh." She groaned,"you're so much like a mom." I grabbed the kettle from the bottom cabinet.
"Mhm." I hummed filling it with water and putting it on the stove.
"Want me to call you Mommy or something?" I knew she was joking.
"Most people i fuck do." I smiled turning around, I leaned on the counter.
"Whaat?" She sat up,"hold up, you're a uh..."she snapped her fingers looking for the word,"mommy dom or whatever they call them.
"I'm a dom but I just like the name mommy, none of that...mdlg shit." I shook my head.
"So it's just to please your mommy issues?" I nodded slowly,"wow. I would've never guessed."
"I can't tell if your being Sarcastic or not." I cocked my head a bit.
"The way you like..reacted when Bruce told everyone to get naked I thought you would've like fought back."
"I was more worried about Ash being shoved in a closet and the fact I was about to strip in front of my brother and strangers and if I was gonna get killed or not." She shrugged her shoulders and laid back down.
"Was sorta hot."
"Please shut up." I shook my head trying to get the memory out of my head,"that was the weirdest night of my life and I've walked in on my dad fucking strippers when I was 6."
"How was it weird?" I turned the stove off as the kettle started whistling.
"Umm...I had to get naked, in front of my brother, while my other brother was shoved into a closet. How is that not weird?" She shrugged her shoulders. I shook my head grabbing two mugs and opened A drawer, I grabbed out two tea bags ignoring the Glock that sat behind the tea box,"you ever have to watch the boy you raise be taken to a closet and shoved in it?"
"No cause I don't have kids and neither do you." I poured the water into the cups, purposely forgetting to add the sugar to Faye's Tea.
"I've been raising Ash with Fez since I walked into the hallway and saw him there in a diaper, Gran didn't say where he came from only that he was part of collateral and soon he was  our brother cause the lady never showed. I think I know what it's like to raise a kid." I put the tea on the table.
"What? You want a Mother's Day card or some shit?"
"I want you to shut the fuck up."I grabbed my tea and laid back on the couch.
"Did You put sugar in this?" She asked.
"No cause youre being a fuckin cunt." I looked at the Tv, I grabbed my phone from the table and sent a text to a group chat with fez and ash.

——-—————————————————————
3 fuck ups in a pod
————————-

Faye is a massive cunt
can I pull  a ash and deal wit her
———

Ginger*
No
——
Lil Man*
Ya go ahead, she keeps stealin my cereal
Hammer is in my room
——-
Ginger*
Searching ur room now
——-
Lil Man*
Smd red head
——

——
Get back to wrk u2
————————————————————————

I rolled my eyes and put my phone on my lap, I looked over at Faye and she was watching the tv, shameless re-runs. She was in shorts and I could see the track marks of where she shoot's up on her thighs.
"Ur like Fiona Gallagher." She pointed to the Tv. It was the episode where Liam gets his hands on the coke she got from her ex.
"I will smother you with that fuckin pillow. I've done it before."
"Why don't you do that to your fuckin grandma? End her misery already." That comment sent a ping or anger into me,"oh I get it your keeping her for her pills."
"Im gonna fuckin kill you in a minute." I threatened

We stayed silent for a few minuets and then she spoke again.
"Does ash have aspergers?" She asked, she trying to get under my skin.
"No he's just a prick." I answered.
"Does Fezco?"
"No he's just always stoned and awkward as fuck."
"So he does."
"Oh my fuckin god." I put my cup down on the table.
"Why is ashtrays name Ashtray?"
"Cause when he was taking a. Bath in the sink he was trying to eat Grans cigarette butts."
"Does he have brain damage from that?"
"No. Do you from herion?"
I heard the lock on the door jiggle before the door opened.
"Yo." I heard fez announce himself.
"It's just herion."
"Thank god." I got up from the couch grabbing my phone and tea,"keep your ass on that couch."
"Okay Mommy." She sassed. I looked at ash as I sat down at the kitchen table.
"What did you say to her Faye?" Fez asked, ash took her jacket off putting it in the chair by me and sat down.
"You good?" He whispered.
"I'm gonna smother her with a fuckin pillow if I hear her voice one more time." I whispered back.
"She just a tight ass." Faye responded.
"I'm going to bed."
"It's 9 though." Fez responded.
"Exactly. Deal with your herion whore."
"She ain't mine."
"You took her in though."