Alberta

Chapter Eight: Strayed too far *

Dusk returned too quickly. I hadn't called Lehi, and yet my hand had been poised on the home phone for what felt an hour.

"Willa will you come clear the table please" My mom called.

I found myself drawn back to the house, back to the staircase I was sat upon, and shaking off the oppressive cloud that felt like it formed over me the moment that I had left Allie's home that afternoon. I placed the phone back to its cradle and stood from the staircase, dragging my feet behind me as I walked to the table and picked up the plates one by one.

"What is wrong with you" My dad observed from his arm chair as he shook out the paper.

I looked at him briefly before picking up more cutlery. "I have a dilemma" I admit sighing.

"Maybe I can help...what is it?" He asks.

"You can't" I reply taking the plates into the kitchen and setting them down beside my mother who is in her apron washing up.

"Get the glasses too" she adds.

I slowly drag myself back to the dining table and my father peeks over his paper once more "come on try me I bet I can help"

I drop the glasses back down on the table and move over to the little stool beside him. He runs his large hand down my long silky dark hair and looks at me intently "Willa share" he encourages.

"Did you kiss a girl before you got married to mom?" I asked. His eyes widen and he looks to the kitchen to see if my mom is listening "Willa what a question" he asks a little taken aback.

I roll my eyes "dad you said I could ask you for help" I remind him.

He nods "I did, I'm sorry" he apologises "so Lehi wants to kiss you" he presumed "and you don't know if you should is that what you are asking" he asks.

"Say Lehi wants to kiss me ... and I do but I don't enjoy it... should I even then continue to date him" I ask confused.

"Well I don't particularly want you kissing him Willa but say hypothetically you did... and you didn't like him, like you thought... then that's okay" he says with a smile and a ruffle of my hair. "You are sixteen you don't have to settle on a husband just yet and maybe it's a good thing or you would get stuck kissing him forever" he chuckles. "Sometimes the only way of truly knowing how you feel about someone is the act of a kiss...but please don't be encouraged to go kiss every boy in church... just remember that acts of intimacy should be reserved for a courting couple who already have feelings for each other, like say you and Lehi, a kiss in that case could be revealing and would be appropriate especially if you were looking to marry"

I smile at my dad. "Can I go out and see Lehi" I ask knowing he will be the one to cave.

"With a chaperone Willa Jameson" he adds sternly but revealing a smile a moment later "and when you are married to Lehi you can thank me for my wisdom" he says with a chuckle.

"I will go to Allie's and have her go with me" I lie. My dad nods and I quickly collect the glasses on the dining table and rush to the kitchen.

I kiss my mother on the cheek and hand her the glasses. "Where are you going" she asks watching me throw on my shoes at the back door hurriedly.

"I have to go to see Lehi quick mom... but I'm chaperoned don't worry" I add before a smile. "See you in an hour" I promise, and I shut the door before she can say no.

The walk isn't long, and as soon as I walk out of the door and turn onto the sidewalk I can hear a beat in my ears, a tribal thump, thump, thump. It vibrates like a humming bird wing upon my breast. My father was right, a kiss sometimes can be the only way to reveal your true desire and it would answer so many questions to kiss Lehi, to have an answer, but his weren't the lips I wanted to kiss tonight.