Alberta

Chapter Thirty Eight: Ben

Allie would have got home a week ago but I haven't heard from her. I know I'm not expecting her for another three weeks but I thought she would have sent word she was home and told me of the trip back. I have a weird feeling that something has happened, and it leaves a sinking feeling in my stomach. I tried calling her yesterday after I got to my cabin, and she didn't answer. I left a message to say I was thinking about her.

When my mom calls I hesitate for a moment but decide to answer incase she knows something I don't.

"How are my girls" she asks as I answer.

"Hi mom... we are fine" I offer, laying back on my bed.

"How is Harper getting on with the girls and on court" she asks.

"She's a natural... must be in the genes" I reply, and she laughs a little.

"your dads, not mine" she adds.

"And she's made some great bonds already. It's great to see her confidence gain day by day. We went hiking this weekend and we had a great time. Its so nice to get to know her mom, she's a great kid and good company for a fourteen year old."

"She is so like you Willa" my mom observes "I know Ben is missing her... he called earlier, they had just spoken with her yesterday and had the weekly update. She mentioned the hike, apparently you saw a moose. I am completely jealous. A moose! You know I love them."

"I know...we took some photos for you. I have sent them via email. So they got back okay did they?" I ask. "Allie and Ben" I add. I can't hold it in any longer I need to know more, and my mom always knew all the family business long before it got around everyone else.

"Yes they got back in a week... visited some places along the way, did some tourist stuff... I think they needed it... to reconnect and work on their marriage. I don't know if you knew but they've not really been doing that great for a long while now"

My grasp of the phone tightens, of course I know that but I can't tell her and the thought of Ben and Allie reconnecting on a week long trip just the two of them made my heart sick.
"So they seem happier" I ask.

She thinks about it... "I only saw them briefly last week. I had to drop off some bits to the house. They were both decorating the garage when I got there, giving it a fresh lick of paint... they seemed playful and relaxed... so yeah I guess it worked... they appear happier"

I roll onto my side and stare into the dark room. The open curtains throw the light of the moon onto my torso.

What was happening. 

"Well I better let you go rest your tired bones my baby. Give my granddaughter a squeeze from me"

I suck up the emotion beginning to take hold so she won't hear it in my voice "night Mom" I reply as carefully and short as possible. She clicks off.

I log into my social media and check Bens profile, sure enough he has made an album the day they returned entitled 'Travels with my love'.

I frown, it deepens as each picture flies by with my finger scrolling quickly trying not to fall on a picture for too long. I stop and back up, there is a picture of Allie, stood at the Grand Canyon with Ben beside her. His arm is around her, both smiling... and behind them, a sunset. I could almost smother the sensations of jealousy when it was random pictures on the road...but a sunset. That didn't stop at jealousy, it wriggled inside of me like a parasite threatening to invade my every fibre. I deactivated my account and flicked the page away. I pressed on my other social media page, and checked my notifications. Allie had liked my picture ten minutes ago of me and my team from today after a game. How could she find time to like a picture but not to email or call me?! I checked her page, no travel pics on her side, but she had been tagged in Bens. He seemed to be flooding his social media with pictures of them both together for the first time in years. He had even changed his profile picture to one of them at dinner. I went to my settings and deactivated that one too. It was childish but I couldn't see it. I didn't want to see anymore of their behind the scenes photographs, of them reconnecting.