Let Go (GXG, MD/LG) A Vanilla Introduction to Submission

3. Alright, I'm Definitely Into This.

Kristen's POV

Kristen may have spiraled last night she realized BDSM sex and the 'vanilla' sex she was having wasn't all that different when it came to basics. She kinda thought everyone liked being choked during sex, apparently choking during sex was apart of edge play and breath play. She didn't even think something as simple as choking had a name to it, but cutting off air flow while being pleasured could cause serious injury if not done correctly. Kristen wonders now if her partners had been doing it in a safe way.

Kristen also realized in the way she enjoyed choking she enjoyed giving up control, she was giving her partners in bed so much trust with her life. Easily if one of her partners refused to let up when it felt like too much she could have died. Kristen didn't even realize how dangerous it was. Kristen letting her partners choke her in bed was already giving them permission to be the dominant and she the submissive. Kristen became so infatuated with the idea she was already a submissive because of the choking she spiraled down away from her new book and into articles about choking all on it's own. She had even written down a passage that spoke to her.

"Choking is an act of surrender, when we completely trust the other, dominant party and let them take complete 'life threatening' control over the submissive party," said an article from Men's Health which was quoting a doctor Holmgren She points out that the "life threatening" aspect of choking is simply a perceived fantasy. You're not really looking for any sort of near-death experience, but the prospect of someone having that power can be hot.

This doctor was right, Kristen never really realized it but she was into not breathing, she couldn't really understand why though. She thought about the last woman she had sex with, it had been a masc lady she met at a bar. When the woman had used Kristen's favorite strap on her she had instantly put her hand around Kristen's throat and she moaned and rolled her hips against the woman on top of her. She hadn't even questioned the random woman's hand around her throat, she had just reveled in how good it felt.

Realizing this Kristen was shocked and sent a text to Nicole without really thinking about it. Kristen: Does being super into choking make me a submissive? Kristen didn't really know the answer but getting the resources that told her it was a submissive and trusting action to let someone else be in control of how much or how little you breathed was actually a big deal. Kristen wondered if any of her previous partners had been close to crushing her esophagus.

Kristen didn't get a text back from Nicole right away, it was a Tuesday afternoon Nicole was probably at work. Kristen hadn't even asked what Nicole did for a living; she probably didn't have free time during the day like Kristen did.

Nicole: No, but choking is a submissive act. You can like submissive acts without actually being a submissive.

Nicole's answer actually kind of disappointed Kristen, since the answer wasn't yes that meant she had to do more research to be sure of if she was or wasn't submissive.

Kristen: I don't want to call myself a submissive before I know for sure but a lot of the basics in these articles I'm reading I have done before and enjoyed. Outside of sex though, I don't know if I could fit into the lifestyle.

Now Nicole's response was faster: That completely depends on the domme you decide to have, some people only have a domme for sex and nothing outside of it. Some people enjoy being a submissive/slave 24/7. Some can only enjoy it for a couple days out of the week, everyone is different with what they like and dislike. Sounds like you need to keep researching, Sweetheart.

Sweetheart, being called sweetheart made Kristen giggle with pleasure, she was always a fan of pet names even if the person calling her a pet name was a stranger. She remembered once how an older woman at her jazz club told Kristen she was 'such a good girl' for singing so well and had then given her a few roses, Kristen couldn't stop thinking about the woman for days.