old love, new love

chapter 3 {crush}

"that was amazing! i really believed you" Chris said smiling at you. you smile at him but it didn't quite reach your eyes. you walk outside as you feel tears forming in your eyes. it was actually harder than you thought and it really brought you back to the happiest time in your life, with Sebastian. you sit down on a bench outside, thinking back to that time.

you quickly try your tears as you hear someone walking up to you, you expected it to be Sebastian but as you turn around you see Chris standing behind you. "are you okay?" he asked you. "yes, i'm fine" you say putting the best fake smile on your face, but he saw right thru you. "what's wrong?" he asked you worried. "it's nothing, just. how do you actors, you know how don't get emotional when you pull from real life shit?" you ask him. "that actually takes a lot of practice" he says, sitting beside you on the bench you were sitting on. "you got a bit overwhelmed by real life feelings?" he asked you and you nod to him. "bad break up?" he asked. "yeah, thought i was gonna marry that man one day" you say softly. you didn't know exactly why you were telling this to a total Stanger but you just felt comfortable with him. "those break ups are the worst" he says staring into the distance. "yeah" you sigh, feeling the emotions rise up in you again.

"you did really well tho" he said after a moment of silence "i was really impressed". "thank you" you say blushing a little, it actually meant a lot coming from him. "so in a way, that break up was good for something" he said jokingly. you laugh at his joke "yeah guess it was" you say smiling at him. "hey you want to get something to eat?" he asked you. "yeah" you said as you stood up and followed him. "you should try the pizza it's really good" he said smiling at you enthusiastically, like a kid in a candy store. "alright, if you say so" you said putting it on your plate. you actually haven't had pizza in a long while. you tried to eat as health as possible, so most days you would just eat a salad or 2 and sometimes a normal healthy diner, but not much more than that.

you both sat down at a table and you take a bite of the pizza, you had no idea you actually missed it so much. "oh my god, this is so good" you almost scream. "told you" he said laughing at your reaction. "i actually haven't had pizza is a year or so" you say to him. "what! why?" he asked surprised, like you were totally crazy for going without pizza for that long. "i tried to eat healthier, lost 40 pounds" you say, actually proud of yourself for being able to do that. "what, that's crazy" he says in disbelief. "yeah, it was worth it tho, i feel a lot more comfortable in my own skin now" you say smiling at him. "well you look really good" he said making you blush. wait was that just a genuine compliment or was he actually flirting with you. "thank you" you say softly still blushing like crazy, making a grin appear on Chris' lips. maybe he was actually flirting with you.

"so what about you, you must have some diet to look the way you do?" you ask him. "well yeah, but it's also mainly working out a lot. it takes a lot of time and dedication to get to the point you want to be" he says "sometimes you have to make sacrifices to do something you love" he says. "yeah i know about that" you say knowing exactly what he meant. the entertainment business was no joke. "you sacrificed a lot for your career?" he asked you. "yeah more than i would have liked to. i never really crossed a boundary yet tho" you said to him. "what is the most fucked up they told you to do, if you don't mind me asking?" he asked you. "oh well, there was this one guy who wanted me to you know, 'pleasure him' in exchange for a record deal" you told him. "wow that's fuck up" he said shocked. "oh yeah, wasn't the first time i heard that though. there are a lot of man like that in the business" you say. "how do you even react to that?" he asked actually shocked now. "oh i make them very clear that i'm a singer and not a escort, and then i just leave. you know what the weird thing is? it are always the unattractive man that ask me that. why don't hot man ever ask me that" you joked. "because good looking man usually have manners" he says. "oh so you have manners?" you ask him jokingly. "well i mean" he says a bit caught a bit of guard by your boldness. "guess you have to find out" he says back, confidently. "well guess i have to" you say smiling at him.

"so how do you know Sebastian?" he asked. "he was one of the people that helped me when i moved to New York" you tell him. "oh where are you originally from then?" he asked. "i'm from a small town in the Netherlands" you answer. "o really, i would have never guessed you're not from the states, you don't have an accent at all" he said. "i worked really hard to get rid of my accent, guessed it worked" you say. "so were you and seb just friends or" he asked. shit you didn't want him to know about your relationship with seb. especially because they were friends, and you really started to have a crush on Chris, you didn't want to risk them having some sort of bro code . "oh no we were just good friends" you say not looking at him as you answer. "you seem really close though?" he asked not really believing you. "yeah well, he was the only one that understood my struggles when i moved to New York. since you know he kinda went thru the same things" you tell him. "was it hard moving here?" he asked. "well yeah kind off, i was a 17 year old girl who moved from the Netherlands to New York all alone, trying to figure out what she wanted in life. so yeah it was though at times" you tell him. "wait you moved alone, do your parents still live in the Netherlands?" he asked, the question made your heart ache. "no, my parents died when i was 12" you reply. "oh i'm so sorry" he said, guilt in his tone. "it's okay" you say smiling at him reassuringly.

at that moment Chris 'phone goes off. "oh shit i have to go" he says as he stands up. before he walks away he turns to you and says "hey would you like to go out for drinks some time?". "yeah i would really like that" you say smiling. "great" he says smiling back before he walks off. "great job today!" he yells before he disappears into the building, making you smile.