Smile When You Dive In

Chapter 1

Their world was a scary one; Regulus had known this for as long as he could remember. Some of his earliest memories were the stories of the kelpies and sirens his mother would weave to lull the boys to sleep. When he got older and Walburga tired of such things, Regulus would often ask Kreacher about the things that lurked in the shadows and below dark tides. In a welcome break from Walburga's watery fixation, the house elf was particularly fond of a story about the 'Black Shuck', a dark shaggy dog that would doom anybody who looked at it to death. Sirius had found that one hilarious, taking the story and embellishing, until he had Regulus believing that the Black Shuck was one of their ancestors who had been turned to a dog by his mother for consorting with muggles. For years, Regulus would clamp his eyes shut at the sight of any dog, black or not, for fear of imminent death. He was sure he hadn't done anything to warrant such a punishment, but knew better than to test Walburga, even at his tender age. For Regulus also knew about the monsters closer to home, the ones he called family, whose cruelty he pretended not to see the depths of, no matter how often he was given reminders.

The one place Regulus usually considered himself to be safe from such horrors was his dorm room at Hogwarts. His four-poster bed was his alone, and he cherished having the space to himself, away from the harsh reality that washed further over Regulus day by day. As such, it was a grave disappointment to be yanked by the elbow from this place of safety and bliss by a most unwelcome intruder late one night.

"That brother of yours has done it now!" The poison dripped into Regulus' ear like the grease drenching Snape's hair.

"Whatever he's done, it's nothing to do with me." Regulus peeled Snape's hand from his arm, glancing around the dimly lit room to be sure his roommates hadn't been roused. A pang of familial responsibility crept upon him, although he still felt conviction in what he was saying. Over the past year, it was almost certain Snape would've had more dealings with Sirius than Regulus had, so there was no reason for him to bring his misgivings to his bed like that.

"It will be when they expel him!" That had Regulus' attention. He rubbed the sleep from his eyes and took in Snape's full appearance. He wasn't just greasy, he was soaked. And clearly seething, paler than Regulus thought it possible for a person to be, with his little red curl of a mouth still moving as Regulus blinked. "They won't have a choice, they'll have to. Him and his friends, especially the half-breed!"

Snape's voice was at risk of being raised, and though he was probably spouting nonsense, Regulus didn't much feel like having the other boys overhear it. Selwyn already gave him enough grief about his brother's choice of company, without giving him any more reason to complain. Regulus stalked away from Snape, turning at the door expectantly.

"If I'm going to listen to this, I'm not doing it here." Severus didn't even argue with him for once, which was the second surprise Regulus had that night, but far from the last.

Out on the landing, he listened to Snape recount his harrowing night out on the grounds. Sirius had told him to follow Lupin down to the Whomping Willow. Lupin being a werewolf. The rest of them turning into animals. He seemed almost as offended that they would make a secret of becoming unregistered animagi as he was by Lupin's alleged condition, though frankly Regulus found that the easiest part to believe. It was exactly the kind of thing his brother and his ridiculous friends would get themselves into.

A werewolf, though. Would Sirius really get himself involved in that? Once, when they were little, his brother had told him that he was going to track down a werewolf they could keep as a pet, sneaking it food from the dinner table and making Kreacher help take care of it. But Regulus doubted very much that Sirius even remembered that now. Lately, it seemed that Sirius was incapable of remembering anything he and Regulus had talked about as children. Their plans to run away together, or how Sirius swore to always protect him; those conversations had slipped Sirius' mind, apparently along with any semblance of sanity he'd once had.