Forelsket

57: Subic and Dinner

Sakura's POV:

We woke up early as usual as we got ready to order food for breakfast. Today is the last day of our stay in Clark, Subic. Later tonight, we'll be travelling back to Pampanga, City of San Fernando to join Skylar Unnie's family. The four of them, Chaeyeon, Kwangbae, Eunbi Unnie and Duck spoke with Skylar Unnie's family before coming here. Chaeyeon said that it was better to ask Unnie's family first, before going, cause they might not want the performance we were planning to do for Skylar Unnie. The pain in her unsure voice, a week after she and Minju was practicing the ten songs over and over. Was something I don't know how to ease away from her, I was the one who suggested talking to Skylar Unnie's family first and if they don't want the performance, we can just go at a later time to perform. The family was delighted to hear that Skylar's Team mates all seven of them had debuted already and would like to celebrate the life of Skylar with them. They made arrangements for us and tonight we were supposed to have dinner with them at our hotel in Pampanga.

Chaen was just quietly sitting at the veranda of our suite as she waits for food to arrive, we've ordered room service. The rest of our kids are still sleeping, still too tired from yesterday. I joined her briefly after pulling up the blanket Wonyoung has over her body, it has slightly fallen down, so I pulled it up for our Maknae before going to sit with Chaen. I approached her and sat beside her, I felt her put her arm around me, tucking me in with her. Silence filled us both as we both looked out the sea. The calmness of the waves sounding along with the beating of our hearts. I was calm all my life, having been surrounded by the seas and mountains of Kagoshima, similar to this place, we watched the majestic sun rise from the dark skies. All her troubles are now slowly dissipating into nothingness, I can see her changes, surprising for the nine of them who has been training with her.

But for me she was always a fan of me, she was always nice in my eyes, despite all her issues in life. The fact that she came to see me back then, meant she wasn't really losing everything all together. She managed to come the first year since her two unnies had passed on. Though she looked lost and out of it, her demeanor quickly changes to that of pure bliss and joy. If I would've known what happened that year, I would've treated her better, offered some consoling words and support for her. Heck, I would've gotten her email and write her letters from the Star to her Fan. I would've consoled her and boosted her strength. My Fans are always treated like they were my friends. Like they are an indispensable part of who I am, like my blood flows through out my body because of my fans, my fans are my heart, they're all so friendly and warm people with the exemption of course of the 22 year old and up men, who sexualizes me, those can fuck off to the end of the world, but my fans like Chaeyeon, the younger or same age ones, they're the indispensable parts of me.

We've forged a stronger bond over time, for every thousand bad comments, my fans would drown them with one hundred thousand more lovely comments. They are the sole reason why I exist in this industry, when I could've stopped all together and went to Uni and become a doctor. One who saves lives but could also kill someone. The silence of the morning, just before the chaotic ten gets up was always a welcome treat for me. I don't speak, it's too early to talk about anything, I enjoyed her quiet self, not the consistently angry one. I know, she's thinking of the things we might encounter tomorrow, all the what ifs and what nots, it must be noisy in her mind, but I let her be, as long as she's not screaming and shouting madly at everyone. As long as she's calm like this, I have nothing against this comfortable silence we are having. Only when the doorbell of our suite sounded, did I leave her side and answered the door, I was greeted with a good morning by the Hotel Staff as she pushed the carts of food I ordered for twelve and laid every dish on the living room table of the room. She bows in front of me and told me to enjoy the food, I smiled and bowed back at her and handed her a one hundred peso bill in the Philippine Currency as tip for her service, she bows again, wide eyed and seemingly grateful. She shows herself out the door and I went to our room to wake up every one who was still sleeping.