You Have Come To The Right Place ~ (Sixx: AM)

Chapter Twenty Two

**AUTHOR'S NOTES**

Before I proceed with this chapter, there are a few things I want to talk about...

First off, I want to wish Alessia ( ) a Happy Birthday! -- I normally don't dedicate my work to anyone but since I couldn't get you a real gift, I hope this update will suffice! (Love you, girl! Enjoy your day today! Lots of love xoxoxo !)

Now...onto the real talk.... Posting this feels pretty vulnerable and I've noticed that writing about trauma tends to hit me harder than writing about the eating disorder and I'm not completely sure why. I've personally gone through both so one isn't any less "real" than the other, but the more complex and "unfamiliar" the topics are, the more "exposed" it feels to share them...and maybe that's where the discomfort stems from. Judgement. People being unaware and confused, or possibly in denial that these symptoms/diagnoses are real... But rationally, I know. I'm speaking my truth (and hopefully others' truths) through my writing... I want others to feel validated and understood...that they're not alone in what they're going through, and that their experiences are completely valid.

If you read this whole thing, thank you so much. Now, onto the warnings/disclaimers.

**This chapter is revolved around TRAUMA and the many manifestations of trauma -- COMPLEX PTSD in particular. With that being said, please be aware that some subject matter may be uncomfortable to read. If at any point, you need to stop, PLEASE do. This is not easy reading (and I know that). Your mental health and well-being is the most important.

There is discussion of SOMATIC and EMOTIONAL FLASHBACKS, DISSOCIATION, REPRESSED MEMORIES, and other symptoms of complex trauma such as: SELF-BLAME, EXTREME DENIAL, SELF-HATRED, FEELINGS OF HELPLESSNESS/POWERLESSNESS, and OVERWHELMING CONFUSION. There are no detailed descriptions of specific traumatic events, BUT past abuse is strongly implicated**

As always, I want to say thank you for continuing to stick with this story and for your lovely supportive & insightful feedback...Don't hesitate to drop any questions you may have about anything in the comments section...I am always glad to answer! I am attaching a few articles I found regarding what James is experiencing if anyone in interested in learning more...They can be found in the ENDING NOTES!

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The next day

Early-Afternoon

JAMES'S P.O.V:

A gentle knock on my door pulls me away from the disconnected state my mind has me trapped in, and it sends a shiver down my spine. Although the sound was loud enough for me to hear, my body's exhausted state keeps me glued to my mattress. The only movement that I feel capable of at this moment is rolling over to my other side.

That's when I see Rachel smiling at me through the doorway entrance. I suddenly have a huge pit in my stomach.

"Hey pal!" The expression on her face is full of enthusiasm and her words seep with liveliness. "How's it goin?"

This much peppiness feels like it's too much for me... I currently feel surrounded by a hazy disorientation, as I slowly lift myself into a sitting position, fighting the slight dizziness that washes over me as I elevate. All I can do is stare at Rachel in my daze-like state.

I force myself to blink a few times to attempt to snap myself out of my head. That's when I notice the slightly crooked smile that Rachel is giving me. She is standing next to my bed now.

"Crazy few days?"

My muscles immediately stiffen up as I try to hide the internal cringes that arise. All I want to do is roll my eyes but I don't. Instead, I allow a slightly sarcastic laugh to slip outta my mouth, only enhancing my urge to hide away. "Yeah... It's been wild... "