Diaries of a Seventh Grader

04-15-15; My Math Teacher Will Now Call Me Masha...

Theme Song (Mood/Life Feelings); "Kill The Lights" The Birthday Massacre.

My Day?

Fucked In The Ass-A-Majiggies.

Mm Hmm I said it.

The Only thing cool is the fact that I don't have to deal with anyone at all tomorrow.

ANYONE.

Only Pantera.

We are both going on tomorrow's Field Trip for Orchestra at the Airport.

Sadly I won't see Ken Or Janae or Sandra.

Other than that?

Nope.

Sorry to the others. Some of the others I barely ever see anymore.

But I'm just screwed at the moment.

I need to straighten shit- and since I'm talking like this FUCKING WILDEBEEST STYLE- you can see that I am pretty done/pissed/upset.

So FUCKING KARKAT yeah.

I haven't been talking much lately either because of that stuff that's going on.

So I'm technically like Sandra says "Don't Be The Elsa To My Anna"

She's right about that.

That's exactly the life right now.

God damnnnnnn.

Not to mention my stupid ass overrated mostly painful migraines and headaches I have constantly like 24/7.

DAMMNNN.

Only good thing is that in first period in Math in Mr.Rizos I stood next to the door at the last 5minutes if class as usual and this is what I did;

Me: *Takes a piece of chalk and draws a weird face in board* *Then writes "Masha Was Here!!!"

Robert (optimus); Really?

Me: Yup.

Mr.Rizo: hmmm Masha? Who's Masha?

Robert; Maria.

Mr.Rizo; hmmm Masha....is that your middle name?

Me: first.

Mr.Rizo; then what's Maria?

Me; the same. Maria's the English way of saying Masha which is Russian.

Mr.Rizo; oh. Hmm Masha. I like that. Would it be ok if I call you that?

Me: *Nods*

*Bells rings*

BOOMM FEEL THE THUNDA BABY.

(Yeah that didn't make me feel better by saying that.)

So yeah he's gonna call me Masha now.

Mrs.Hayes, my reading teacher is that once on accident In the beginning if school cuz Alissa called me that.

I didn't mind but she doesn't ever say it.

Oh well.

At tennis I haw three friends; Aden (8th Grade), Kyler, and this boy I just became friends with who is in the musical with me.

It's just the four of us in our little group.

On the bus we sit in the front.

Today we watched Kyler play FNAF3 and some block game and Aden gave us some oreos.

Mr.Lopez went downtown to see a soccer game instead of going XD. Coach Sanchez was like 'really. On our game day. He could've went tomorrow.'

Dittoooooo.

In the musical club I sing and yell the parts of Molly from the song "Hard-Knocks Life" from Annie. (Love that song)

Mrs.Vela said we might do Wicked's "What Is This Feeling"

I hope so.

If so I hope I can sing as Elphaba. <3

"Dearest Momsy and Popscicle..."
"My Dear Father..."

But other than that everything is BULL SHRIMP.

I've Been literally full of horrible things in my body (mind, feeling angry and just bad feelings).

I can't take this anymore...I might not be on wattpad for a little while...just until I calm down and try and understand what the fuck is wrong with me........

I'll probably check up on it every few days but I won't text much for a week or so so I get get everything in order.

I don't know what to do anymore.

I'm just so fucking frustrate with everything now.

It's not my grades, trust me (Everything is an A except it one B in Math-86)

Frustration levels are rising my dear friends.

*Throws backpack at wall and leans against wall*

I swear I'm losing it with my stupid fucking issues and my friend shit........I'm am fucking sorry everyone but I'm fucking out for now.

I need to straighten my self and my life out.

My friend Janae told me today about how every Wednesday now she goes to the 6th grade hallway for this Social Group Thing.

From what I was told it is like in the movie The Fault In Our Stars; The People sitting in chairs and discussing problems and issues.

I hope it is.

That's what I've been wanting and needing for so long.

Something like that to help me.

I'm tired if going to my counselor every now and then for a fucking check up. It just gets uncomfortable.

And I feel just like I need other people near my age groups to talk to and ask them and talk to them to understand and know my problems better.

That group sounds like a good plan.

But I decided if I do join ill see how it goes for the first two Wednesdays and If I like it ill keep going.

When I say I like it I mean that it literally helps me and makes
Me feel more same and controllable over everything.

I really hope it does.

But really that's not what I have to worry about.

It's the fact that I need to know more info on the while group thing.

I want to know how and when you get in.

Does it start in the beginning of he school year or second half?

If its in the beginning I'd like to join next year for my target time and just feel more relax as sane.

I'm a very stressful person.

And even though I always have my dad to talk to I feel like I'm slowly edging away from him.

My moms I've already been edged away from. That was one million years ago.

I don't know what I even do anymore. I talk to Mr.Cepeda and I write and channel my anger within me and I even talk to myself when I'm alone in my room to straighten everything and try to reach out to others but I get nothing out of it.....should I just hide from people? I'm going to ask about a social speaking group I can join on Wednesdays during target time in the 6th grade hallway. If that doesn't help I don't know what will...

That's why I've been wanting to join that group (since today).

Screw my shit and my shitty ass life....I can't straighten myself....

Well.....

Peace Out For Now Guys.

~TheStressedM