Diaries of a Seventh Grader

05-20-15; Blood Everywhere, Masha's A Damn Baka Who Caused Panic Attacks

Well my day was....intruding.....horrific........

First I wanna say sorry to my friends Alissa, Regan, Isabella, Demetri, and Marcy.

I'm sorry about what happened after school.

And Regan and Alissa?

It wasn't your faults. Please don't Blame yourselves or get upset (you to Regan.)

My day was going ok today.

In reading class my crush 'J.W.' Was reading (we took turns reading chapters of the class book to the class) "The Outsiders" when it came to a part that went "Damnit Johnny..."

J.W. Froze and stared at Mrs.Hayes awkwardly and she went "Go ahead this is an open houSe sweetie." And he went "DAMMIT JOHNNY!" I laughed my ass off as he finished with a couple more dammit a from the reading if the last page chapter.

Then Alissa went "awwww I wanted to read that part." and Mrs.Hayes went "You did? You wanted to read the dammit part?" And I started laughing more.

Idk why I just did.

Then Marcy,Alissa, Demetri, Regan, and I (and my otaku bud Tyler) went to tutoring. I talked with Isabella and helped then with their stuff.

We then went to the gym hall to sit. Marcy watched vids on her phone and Demi and Alissa talked. I was walking with Regan back and forth talking and Isabella too.

My friend (No name of who it was) took out her plastic knife and so called "blade" and said we could dispose of the knife only since Kira wasn't there. (She was gonna do it with us).

"Friend" used to cut herself with this. We bent it Regan and I, like crazy and tosses it away. I went to get water with ISSY and we came back and Regan showed me the 'blade'.

I looked at Friend crazy and went "You can't possibly cut yourself with that! It looks like a plastic paper! How could you possibly do that with that?" Oh you could cause I done-goofed.

I lined my finger with it and it immediately started gushing out blood like crazy. I went "Oh my god- WHAT THE HELL!" And Regan jumped back in fear "HOLY SHIT! M-Masha PH MY GOD!"

It was bloody all over my hand and it started dripping on the floor as I ran to the fountain.

Miss Alisha got me a bandaid and everyone else, panicked.

Isabella held the water fountain for me and I got a paper towel and covered than damn thing and it bled through the paper. The fountain water was red and it kept gushing.

Finally Isabella and I made a plan. As soon as I wiped the damn thing and squeezed the alcohol gel on it and I quickly cOvered it with the band aid Right before It could even drop to my finger tip.

I sighed in anger and yelled "so stupid! Stupid stupid! It's all my fault! If only I hadn't been so damn stupid and thought oh well this can't happen then it wouldn't have happened!" I wanted to punch myself so damn bad.

These boys from the boys gym were like "ew" my friend nick went "you cut yourself? Your fucking crazy"

Demi started yelling at him and arguing and I felt worse.

I saw Alissa trying to calm a panicked Regan out who sat in the corner gasping.

I kept apologizing to them.

Alissa and Regan thought it was there fault. But I told them "NO." It was my fault they didn't hand me the blade and go "see if it's sharp!" "Oh here enjoy!" And they didn't make an opinion on how it's not possible to cut and proved it. It was all me. I was to blame not them.

So if you guys are reading this, I'm sorry. Regan I didn't mean to scare you and I'm just angry. I still can't get the image of you freaking out out of my mind. I'm sorry and you know it wasn't intended. Just, I'm sorry so please don't blame yourself.

You too Alissa. I wasn't your fault either.

After that as Demi argued with Nick,
Isabella saw I was about to cry and we went to the gym hall again.

I told Miss Alisha if Clean the blood because she didn't have to and shouldn't have to it wasn't her fault! So I did and I kept thanking her for helping me and stuff.

I just went to the window and stared numbly out as the tears formed and fell and I leaned my head against the window muttering how much of a disgrace and stupid Thing I was.

Isabella came to help me and say how people make maintained and we stood there talking and she went off.

Regan talked to me and hugged me and I kept apologizing and telling her it wasn't her fault that she handed me the blade.

Then Isabel came and the two if us talked when Regan left. "Keep me posted" is what she told us all before she left.

Marcy was gone too. She left a long time ago. Idk when but it was right when I bled and I ran off. That was the last time I saw her.

So yeah my day turned into Shit easily again.

Plus my friends have had a feud and two of them aren't friends anymore.

And meanwhile I believe one of them is not talking to me for god knows what but walked past me with a evil glare so yeah.

But in pissed and upset about it.

Later we went to the gamers on and ISSY left.

Alissa and I pizzicatoed Our violins. (I had a bandaid but I still could do it)

This boy just my started touching our Violins and we had to help at him and he ran off.

Kira came and Alissa and I told her the story.

Kira taught me about what that blade thing was and how it could've happened. "You have many veins in your fingers. You probably cut a minor one not a major one."

We then watched a video from Kira's birthday when she opened presents last year.

And that was it.

The shittiest day if the school year I'd have to say.

Well Peace out Mashins.....

~UpsetAngryPissedAtSelfM