Left or Right

Chapter 26

.James.

"Hey," James says the following day softly, entering the kitchen and finding me sat by the island. He kisses the top of my head as he walks around the table only to sit opposite me so he could look at me properly, but when I look up at him, I bite my lip.
"Hey," I mumble.

I hadn't spoken to him since yesterday because by the time he got home last night, I was already asleep. I pretty much knocked myself out the second I entered the bedroom after Harry had dropped me off.
I knew that if I had stayed up, I would have only had the girls' comments stuck in my head so I took to sleeping instead with the hope that I'd wake up feeling better today, but strangely enough, I only felt worse.

"When I got home last night I went into your room but you were already fast asleep in your dance clothes. You looked exhausted, Ri," he tells me, causing me to shrug my shoulders as I look up at him.
I didn't want to burden him with what was currently going on at dance. I should be grateful that he and Deborah are even allowing me to stay with them when my parents are being so toxic towards me. 

"You could have called me to pick you up. I would have done so, you know," he says, stretching his hands across the table, hoping to hold mine. But I take one look at them and shake my head, my eyes drifting down to my hands as I fiddle with my rings.
"I didn't want to disrupt your night with the guys," I answer, but he raises an eyebrow, shaking his head back at me.

"I would have left them to pick you up-"
"That's exactly why I couldn't bother you like that," I mumble, looking down, knowing he wouldn't exactly understand. 

If I had called James to get me, the boys would have only grown annoyed about it and they would begin to look at me in resent just like the girls do. I've got enough people on the team detesting me as it is. I don't need the guys to join in too - that's if they don't feel the same way already.

James looks at me curiously, studying my face as if to suss out what was going on with me but I wasn't about to tell him. Chances are he understands how the team are feeling and thinks the same thing as they do.

"Is everything okay?" he asks, looking at me carefully still to gage my attention. He had it, but I just couldn't explain it. I wouldn't be able to let it down if he shared some of the same feelings. I see why they're annoyed but to go to the extent of all turning against me like they did yesterday? I've never felt more isolated in my life. "Babe?" he pushes. 
I raise my head to look at him before licking my lip a little, trying to figure out what to say to him.

"I'm gonna go for a walk," I whisper. 
He was about to interrupt, but before he could, I stand up and put my hand out to him to bring him to a halt.
"I appreciate it but I'd rather go alone."

"Riley . . ." he says as a warning, as if to try and put an end to whatever was going through my mind, but it wasn't going to work. He wasn't there to watch what had gone down in Hidalgo's. Maybe if he was there, it wouldn't have ended up being this bad. Maybe I wouldn't feel this guilty. 

"I'm okay," I whisper, avoiding eye contact with him. "Don't worry about me."

. . . 

We were due to have a party for our going away to Internationals tonight and all the Next Step dance teams would be showing up as it was taking place in Studio A - that included the little ones as well.
It must have been about an hour to the time when I headed into the bathrooms on my own to finish getting ready for the night. I needed to add the finishing touches to my make-up before entering that studio where everyone would be looking at me.

The toilets were empty when I entered, meaning I could have a breath of fresh air and buy myself enough time to pull myself together. 

Setting my purse down by the sink, I take out my lipstick and open it up, rolling it upwards to smear some of its crimson wine color over my lips, but just as it takes only about five or so seconds before the door opens once again, and through the reflection of the mirror I watch as Stephanie enters with Amanda by her side.
The moment my eyes land on them, I sigh and begin to pack my things, wanting to get the hell out of there.

"Miss Perfect just keeps trying to get more perfect, doesn't she?" Steph sneers, making me roll my eyes to myself as I shake my head, grabbing a tissue when I accidentally smear some of the lipstick above my lip.
"Don't worry, I'm leaving now. I'll be out of your way," I mumble, gathering my things and quickly wiping away the dot of make-up I had drawn over my face.

I turn around, holding my purse in my hand but restricting me from leaving, she stands by the doorway with her arms folded over her chest while Amanda stood there beside her, blocking the way just as much.
"Guys, seriously. Just let me leave, okay," I try to get through to them, but Stephanie laughs at me sardonically and shakes her head.
"I don't think so," she teases, making me take a step back to look at her.

"Whoops, looks like she missed a spot," Amanda chips in, pointing to the remaining mark I had on my cheek from the lipstick which causes the two of them to cackle with laughter but me to look down, biting my lip and just wanting to leave.
"Cute necklace," Stephanie adds, looking down at it. "I'm guessing lover boy got it for you?"

"You can just call him James . . ." I mutter, rolling my eyes to myself and looking down at the love-heart locket I held against my chest.
"Funny," Amanda smirks, tutting her teeth. "I have a similar one that looks just like that. And yeah, James was the one who bought me it."

I knew she was just trying to mess with my head to turn James and I against each other but I knew Amanda and I could tell when she was scheming. She might have a similar one but it would never be as special as the one I'm wearing now because I got this one passed down to me from James's grandmother when we first met.

She gave it to James when she was lying on her death bed and told him to give it to the girl he loves most and he gave it to me when we were both in the hospital, just after she passed away. It had always been a piece of jewellery James and I both held close to our hearts.

"Can you just let me go? I don't understand why you're doing this," I say to them both. "I thought we were friends."

"Friends don't swoop in and take everything away from the team to be put in the spotlight, Riley. But since you're asking for it, it's clearly what you want so we'll put you in the spotlight all you like," Stephanie responds, making my stomach churn as I swallow.
"I didn't ask for this to happen, okay. If you have a problem then why don't you talk to Kate?"

"Kate's pretty much blind to what goes on in this studio, Riley. She'd never listen to me over you. The teacher's pet just gets petted more every day."
"Like a little kitten," Amanda adds onto Steph's statement.

"But you know what? I think this kitten might have too much fur for my liking," Steph continues, taking a few steps closer towards me and then worming her fingers through my hair, stroking it lightly. She bites her lip, looking down at me before shaking her head. "You could really do with a haircut, Riley, don't you think?"
But all I could really think right now was that I needed James. I needed him right now but there was no chance he'd enter the girls' bathroom so randomly.

"What do you think, Amanda?" she asks her, and I look up to see Amanda holding a pair of scissors in her hand, a smirk riding her face. It was like I didn't even know these girls anymore . . .
"Time for some snippies," Stephanie smirks, taking the scissors from one of the girls I thought was my friend, while she grabs my hair, pulling it tightly and making me squirm.

But I just couldn't move a muscle as she pushed me back so that I was up against the wall while she did her dirty work.