ʀᴇᴄʟᴜsᴇ! homesick

CH 24: Summer

Most days, I don't bother to look in the mirror to see if I look alright.

Call it PTSD when I fought inside the mirror realm, or the fact that I couldn't stand my own reflection sometimes, but today I actually cared.

You only graduate high school once, right?

I study myself intently, not in a vain way, but in the way that everything had to be perfect. I had to be perfect.

My hair was neatly curled, and I wore makeup. It was a new skill I learned, because I had to hide how pale I looked and how the bags under my eyes were getting worse.

Some days I felt 110%, others I was running on fumes.

I wore a classic white dress underneath my blue graduation robe and cap. I practiced my smile. It was to no avail, because I promptly gave up.

I always thought I would be walking across the stage, with my friends, but as I find myself walking the stage for real, I can't help but look for their faces in the crowd.

Instead, I'm met by Bruce, Dick, Barbara, Tim, Cass and Damian. I smile because maybe I don't have the friends that I used to, I had what I had dreamed for: a big family.

I grab my diploma from my principal, whose name I forgot almost instantly, and I look out in the crowd with a small smile as they announce my achievements. While I wasn't valedictorian because of my lack of a record, I still had the highest grades in my class.

My eyes are drawn to the back of the concert hall, and my eyes meet Jason's. He's near the doors, propped up against the wall, I walk down the stage, and wave at him. He waves back.

I sit down in my seat, and I space out for the rest of the ceremony, waiting for it to be over.

"-I know it feels like we're saying goodbye, but we will carry a piece of each other into everything that we do next, to remind us who we are, and of who we're meant to be. I've had a great four years with you, and I will miss you very much." Our valedictorian sits down, and our principal stands up.

"Congratulations seniors, you've graduated! I personally wish you success in all you future endeavors. Good luck to the class of two-thousand-"

Her words are drowned out by the screams of our graduating class. Caps are tossed into the airs, friends are hugging, hands are pumped into the air, and others are just jumping with joy.

I make my way through the crowd, crunching confetti underneath my feet. Weaving through friends and family alike, I stand in front of the Wayne's.

I'm met with congratulations and hugs.

I've given a hug by everyone, except Damian of course. Instead, Damian holds out his hand to me. I shake his hand, and I know that I've finally earned his respect.

I look for Jason, but the entire family is swept into the limo, as we go out to a fancy dinner in celebration of my graduation.

The entire drive over to the Italian restaurant is Barbara and Dick reminiscing about their high school days now that they've started college.

College.

I hadn't thought about what my life would be like after high school since... yeah, it's now worth dwelling over anymore.

I nod during the conversation when I'm supposed to, and I respond when I'm ask for an opinion. But I felt hazy and kind of lost. I didn't imagine I'd ever make it to this point.

"Vivi, where are you going to college?" Dick asks.

"Oh? I don't know. I applied for a couple, but I won't find out all of them for a few more days."