Everything was hazy and silent, and two gentle green eyes stared into his own. "Hello, Dean." He murmured quietly, not wanting to ruin the tranquil atmosphere.
Dean smiled. Of course he smiled. He had a good smile. "Heya, Cas." He answered just as careful. His smile faltered when he had to reach up and swipe sticky tears from Castiel's cheeks. "It's okay."
"I know. I just... miss you." Cas replied blushing brightly.
Dean smirked, "I know." He pulled Cas in for a tight hug. "But you're so strong."
"I want you to come back." He said, his voice cracking brokenly. Dean's fingers ghosted over Castiel's high cheekbones.
"I'm sorry, Angel." Dean responded, stroking a hand through Castiel's tangled hair.
"Is this real? Are we real?" Cas whispered secretly.
"You are very real, Castiel James Novak." Dean answered, placing his mouth on Castiel's. "You are very real, and very good."
"Is this a dream?" Cas wondered abruptly, and in Dean's silence, he found his answer. Wiping his eyes with the back of his hand, he leaned forward, touching Dean's forehead with his own. "I wish this was real." He said.
Dean 'hmm'ed in agreement, before affectionately pecking Castiel's cheek. "Me too."
"I can come to you. I could leave." Cas sniffed, pulling away to see Dean's bewildered expression.
"No, Cas."
"But I can. I want to be with you again."
"I'm right here."
"Dean, I want to be with you. Forever."
"I'll wait."
"Now."
"I promise, I will. I'll wait."
"No, Dean, please."
"Its okay. I promise." And then he was awake.
~~~~
Those dreams weren't even the worst kind. No, the really bad ones were when Dean begged for him to go. Somewhere in his mind, Castiel knew that Dean wouldn't want him thinking like that. Because, sooner or later, his heart would start to heal up. Just like a flesh wound.
But he just missed Dean, so much. It wasn't a small tug at his heart when he walked past his old room at the hospital. Nor was it a miniscule constriction of his chest when his eyes grazed the letter that sat folded on his dresser. It was a deep, unabashed longing for Dean. And there was no mistaking it. Even Mrs. Hutchinson - who now solely held the title of favorite patient - had started to notice Castiel's delicate reservation and unattached personality.
She had mentioned it once or twice, but Cas always brushed it off, claiming for it to be lack of sleep. Which wasn't a complete lie. He hadn't been sleeping much. Just wasn't in the mood. He seemed at his wits end.
When Gabriel had announced that he and his special friend, Matthew, were officially together, Castiel found himself looking away from their clasped hands. Or worse, glaring openly at Matthew, who was, decidedly good-looking, but not Dean. And whatever anyone said, he wasn't jealous of his brother. He was just grieving in a very jealous manner.
And, it wasn't only his friends or the people close to him that started to notice. Patients he checked on a few times didn't speak to him much, because of his sour turn of lips. Coworkers that he barely knew blatantly avoided him in the maze-like corridors. Sometimes even going a minute out of their way, just to escape the storm cloud that was Castiel.
He was done, and it was evident.
Castiel was ready to be with Dean again, but he wasn't ready to die.
It was only a matter of time before he would give up.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: I am aware that this is a short chapter with a cliff hanger-y ending. However, there is a vast possibility of me updating again today. So, we'll just have to wait and see.
*mischievous laughter*
Love you!
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John Doe
FanfictionDean Winchester isn't much. He's a high school dropout who shares his home with his younger brother, Sam - and Sam's girlfriend - and who works at a scrap yard with his uncle. His routine is fairly normal. Get up, argue with Sam, go to work, come ho...
