50 Shades of Drake 5 and 6

Chapter Thirty-One

    "During this conversation, you can speak freely," Aubrey told her. "Don't interrupt me while I'm speaking. Wait for me to finish before speaking. Once I'm finished speaking, you can say or ask whatever is on your mind. Understood?"

    "Yes, Sir."

    He stood from the theater loveseat and extended a hand to her. "Come with me." He led her out of the theater, down the hall, and back through the living room where he slid open the patio door. 

    A bright sun beamed down onto his waterpark of a backyard.

    He strolled casually through the yard while keeping her hand in his. "What does the lifestyle mean to me?" he asked himself out loud. "What does being a Dominant mean to me? Questions we've touched on here and there. I've done more thinking on this, throughout our time together. When I was down in Palmer's basement. When I came back from that, and when we had our...hurdles that we had to get over. I'm not sure you knew all of the things I was going through during the period that you and Brian were..."

    She dropped her gaze downward as they walked, her heart tightening in her chest.

    He let the sentence trail off and tilted his head back, looking up into the sky. "I hate to bring it up, with everything that's happened. But...this is something that I need you to know. Okay?"

    "Okay," she said, her voice tinged with sadness.

    "When you were with him, there were so many questions I'd ask myself. I knew you wanted children, so I asked himself if I could just...have them. Even before I'd fully come to terms with wanting to be a father, could I have children? For you? If you wanted me to give up the BDSM lifestyle, give up being a dominant, could I? For you? Could I give up being a Dominant for you, if you asked me?" He slanted a look down at her. "What do you think the answer was?"

    "The lifestyle is probably too important to you to give up for anyone," she said.

    "You would think so," he said softly, leaning into her as they walked. "You would think that it was that important to me, wouldn't you? Being a lifestyle and all?"

    Her brows furrowed. "Are you saying you would give it up for me?"

    His steps halted and he raised their joined hands up to his lips. "By now, you still don't know that I would give up anything and everything for you?" he asked with intensity burning in his eyes.

    She tilted her head to the side while staring at him.

    "Those aren't just empty words," he assured her. "I would. Graham Enterprises. I'd give it up. This house. I'd give it up. My fame, my wealth. All of it. As good as gone. None of it is worth losing you."

    Tears sprang to her eyes.

    He pressed a kiss to the back of her hand, then turned and started walking again. While squinting his eyes, he looked towards the oasis of a swimming pool that dominated his backyard. "There have been so many women in my past, and I'm talking before my Dominant days. There were women who I thought I loved, but none of them made me feel like they were worth giving up everything for. You are the first. It's still very scary for me to love you as much as I do, to need you as much as I do."

    "I love you and need you too," she said softly.

    "Do you?" he asked. "Do you feel like you need me?"

    She narrowed her eyes at him.

    He returned the frank stare. "I only ask because you're so independent. And you have this...I don't know. There are times when I feel like you do need me, and times when I feel like you would be just fine without me."