The secret life

The secret life. chapter 89 I've got to save her

        After me and the Doctor said still feeling sad. Ashley replied.

"so what do we do?"  she asks.

The Doctor and i replied still being frantic "we are just running out of time. and.... i don't know what to do. get caught doing and failing to save you, or let you regenerate and be the victim of the blast. both have a very big chance of getting caught. if not certain." he finishes typing just as I'm summoned by my parents. i was furious my friend was dying i had to save her and I'm called down for chores and helping my parents, and added to that me and the Doctor still felt like it was our fault for getting her into that mess.

      i typed back, Ashley still not responding back, dreading to go downstairs to do normal things when my friend desperately needed my help. "I have to help Katrina's parents. but when i get back.."

he continues "I don't know. try to hold it in the best you can. I don't know what to do. blimey she's got dishes too. ugh! worst time! this isn't good. what if she passes out right there..."

the Doctor pleaded and thought as we were forced to go downstairs no longer able to be there for Ashley.

     our minds were overflowing with thoughts trying to think up someway we could help her or what could happen if we cant, or what will happen if i passed out from the regeneration blast while busy standing up doing dishes. i would be forced to explain to my human parents who had no idea who i truly was and what was going on. they had no idea of the life i lived. my secret life.

while doing dishes we had a lot of time to think which wasn't good for that time. we were thinking too much and getting too desperate. stuck doing chores while my friend was dying. what a life it is to hide so much desperation and danger. and yet hiding the extraordinary parts too.

         as we were thinking we felt once more deep remorse that it could of all been our fault and that Ashley was right that we didn't do enough. her words hurting and effecting us so much now. we got frantic desperate again we had to get back to Ashley as fast as we could she needed our help. our being there for her while she was terrified.

we started speeding up our chores washing the dishes as fast as we possibly could to struggle to get back to help Ashley. we pushed ourselves in our desperate mind thought. we kept one thought in ours minds. "we've got to save her"

surely but quickly our chores got done with  sooner than we thought they would. as soon as we got the word that we could leave i raced upstairs ripping open my tablet without hurting it and opening up the text messages out of breath and aching all over. did she text back? was she ok?

when i opened it i saw no new text messages had been posted. she hadn't been on since asking what were going to do. was she ok? i quickly typed hoping she was on, and somehow still alright.

     "Ashley? Ashley? i hurried what's your condition?" i rushed.

i noticed i was still out of breath, my heart beating so so fast i thought it would break out of my chest.  so i laid back needing a breath and as i did i felt some of the aches, from me rushing to do my chores. my body sore now. the Doctors frantic desperate rush affecting me.  

after those few minutes i still had gotten no response from Ashley. was she regenerating? would i pass out just then? my mind raced though what could of happened and what might happen soon. i continued trying to contact her still desperate and frantic. i wanted a break needing one but the Doctor was too concerned for her to stop.

he texted more "Ashley? Ashley! Ashley!? you there? you on?" but his texts just seemed to float into space. not reaching where she was. me and him slowed down and looked down. we were trying and rushing so hard so we could save her. but when we did she's no where to be found. and all the guilt was just increasing.

       "hello?.... oh Ashley where are you....?"

suddenly a realization came to me. a sad one. part of my parrell perception. i saw what Tris was like in the books she was full of guilt for killing her best friend because of her selfishness and from her panic, and desperate event.

was i selfish? for not wanting to be captured in saving my best friend? for choosing my safety over hers? i felt down was that what happened? did i really do nothing to help her? to save her? 

i continued reflecting my mood at the moment into my texts. "oh blimey.. I've always been selfish.. but the time that i try my best not to be. i almost make myself pass out by working to hard to be anyways... blimey. Ashley? am i too late? hello?" i give up texting her after  that. i had missed my opportunity to help her. to be with her. and it broke my heart. what would happen now? did i lose my best friend? was it my fault? i didn't know. somehow i would find away hopefully somehow someway she was alright.