One Last Shot ✔️

***

Ilaria Logan

I couldn't sleep, I was burning inside. I just want to forget. I don't even know why I'm living, I was never a suicidal.

I tried a lot of times, but it always ended with me crying in the end.

I'm a fucking coward.

Doesn't want to live, yet can't kill herself.

I don't even know what I'm doing. I just got a fucking tattoo of a guys name on my damn butt, and on all that my mom shows up and act like the good mother she is.

She is literally drunk 24/7. Have sex all the time with random men and doesn't even know that she have a daughter.

Until today

She wasn't there for me my whole life, and she thinks I'm gonna show her respect? Seriously, respect is fucking earned and to be honest, yes, I am respect less.

And do I care? I don't know. I guess no cause everyone is on my damn nerves. And I reached a point where I wouldn't give a fuck if I die or not.

I throw myself on my bed as I sighed and looked up at the celling. I grabbed my phone and saw a lot of messages from numbers I don't even recognize.

I went into the messages and me getting a tattoo on my ass pictures were all the way as they all said.

Ilaria having her boyfriends name on her big ass.

I rolled my eyes as I went and texted Anthony. Not that he is gonna answer.

Me: tell your dicks that they should delete all of my pictures and stop lying about us being together cause it will never fucking happen got it?

I turned the phone off as I throw it across me and turned to my left side. I pulled my legs up, as I was looking out the window.

I just feel empty sometimes- no all the time actually, whenever I'm alone that's why I try to never come home.

I hate the emptiness. I hate feeling nothing, not even pain. It's like being in an completely empty room with white walls and not being able to get out.

••••••••••••••

I walked up the stairs to my next class that I unfortunately have with Anthony, Josh and Lyla.

I pulled the handle down as I saw them all siting in their usual places. I went to my place which is beside Lyla.

"Can we see your ass?" Said one of the guys in the class which made them all chuckle as I rolled my eyes and sat down.

"Can we see your dick or no right you won't have one if you keep talking" I said turning my head towards him which made him shut up as Lyla was giggling along with all the others.

I looked back in front of me before Lyla talked.

"The police showed up last night right as you left, you were lucky bitch" she said apply applying lipstick.

"Very lucky..." I whispered under my breath as the teacher walked in and started to talk. The class was as usual boring. Anthony and Tristen were throwing papers at some other guys as Lyla was doing her makeup.

An hour later the bell went on as we all started to walk out the class towards the next one. We have PE now which somehow is also boring.