I Don't Want To Feel Better- [Glamrock FreddyxGlamrock BonniexMonty]

Chapter 31 Broken thrust

After they went shopping they performed, Gregory staying by himself once again, well knowing tomorrow they would be leaving town. Once they were home it was clear something was wrong, Gregory was laying down on the couch, a trash can besides it and he was giggling.

Freddy: Gregory, are you feeling sick?

Gregory: Sick? No... No, I'm great.- the bear moved over to his son.

Freddy: Gregory, could you get up from the couch?- he asked in a firm tone, the kid getting up- Now walk.- the human did so, stumbling around until he fell, the bear catching me- Gregory why the fuck are you drunk?!- the younger didn't respond instead puking onto the trashcan nearby, the taller sighed- C'mon let's take you to the toilet so you can puke there.- he added done with it, but trying to not be to mad right now, figuring there was no way to reason with him drunk.

Chica: You notice that don't you?- she asked Roxy and Monty has Freddy went to the bathroom with his son and Bonnie went over the kitchen to eat.

Roxy: The trashcan, this all being to neet... He was here with someone.

Monty: Probably that someone was the one who brought the beers cuz we didn't have shit hanging around... Which also means they're over 19... This ain't looking good.

Chica: Sure isn't... I'll go help Freddy with this, I'll try to get more information if possible, you two go rest, specially you Monty, you don't look so well.

Monty: I'm fine...

**
It was 1 am, Monty had helped themselves to the remaining beers and was standing on the balcony, his arms over the railing, him looking down his mind spiraling down when suddenly he heard the sliding door open, then they heard footsteps, until he finally felt a hand on his back, not bothering to look behind him.

Bonnie: Are you alright rockstar?

Monty: Yes...

Bonnie: Then why are you looking down like you want to jump.

Monty: Cuz I do...

Bonnie: The suicidal thoughts are to much?- the other nodded- Why won't you speak about it? I'm here for you.

Monty: I just wanna die, there's not another explanation... I feel like shit. Everything hurts so much, I can't even get myself to cry I'm so numb all I can feel is pain.

Bonnie: Why's that?

Monty: I don't know... I guess I just, don't feel like I deserve y'all... I don't deserve to be happy. I've ruined life's.

Bonnie: I think you only really ruined your life... And so what, just cuz you fucked up in the past doesn't mean you're not worthy of happiness or love.

Monty: That's easy for you to say, you didn't ruin your family life, you didn't almost ruin this band, you don't ruin yourself... Just look at me. I'm barely 30 and my body is giving out, I have more scars that I can count, either thanks to doing heroin or cuz of self harming... And since the last relapse I can't stop myself from self harming.- they added, tears forming in his eyes, refusing to look at the other- I should've died. I don't deserve a body, I don't deserve a conscious. I just don't want to exist! Every moment alive, every thought just makes me want to die even more. If I can't be happy, I deserve to get rid of the pain of existing.- he continued now crying the rabbit wrapped and arm around the other.

Bonnie: I know you must be sick of this but, it will get better. Do you really want to give up when we're so close to stability? We're so close of having a house? When you have friends? When you have two loving boyfriend's? Why give up now? You have so much, you have a future. Why take that away from yourself?

Monty: Cuz after all the shit I did, I don't deserve it.- the rabbit let go of him, before holding their face, making the alligator look him in the eyes.

Bonnie: Listen, you deserve this. You deserve everything good that might happen cuz you have went through the most shitty things imaginable. You deserve it.- the taller quickly hugged the other, crying onto his shoulder, the older rubbing their back- I love you. No matter what I love you and I'm here for you.- that statement made them cry even more, dropping himself to their knees, still holding onto the other, crying into his stomach.

Monty: T-thank you... Thanks for being here. Thank you so much, love.- they said bettwen sobs, continuing to mumble incoherent 'thank you's ', the rabbit also getting onto his knees, playing with the other's hair.

Bonnie: How about we go inside? It's warm there and maybe it's time to sleep.

Monty: A-alright.- they replied pulling away from the hug, Bonnie getting up and extending his hand to the other, helping the alligator up, once he was, the older kissed his cheek and forehead.

Bonnie: I love you, but you should go to sleep.- the taller nodded and follwed the other inside, getting to the bedroom, Freddy still wasn't there, but that didn't matter. The rabbit sat down in the middle of bed, his back against the bedframe, the alligator laid his head on the older's lap, Bonnie playing with his hair.

Monty: I love you... Thanks for everything...

Bonnie: It's nothing, now sleep before you overthink even more.

**
It had been half an hour since Monty had fallen asleep on his lap and Bonnie got trapped, when finally the bear appeared, throwing himself onto the bed next to Bonnie, who petted his head.

Bonnie: Is Gregory ok?

Freddy: Yeah, but fuck tomorrow he isn't going to hear the end of this...

Bonnie: I think that the hangover he'll get will be enough of a punishment, but go ahead and lecture him. I wouldn't trust him by himself after that.

Freddy: How are you, though? Why are you seating isn't more comfortable to lay down?

Bonnie: Yeah but Monty fell asleep in my lap.

Freddy: Let me get some pillows for your back then.- he said getting up and moving over to the closet- How about Monty? What happened to them?

Bonnie: They were having the usual problem's... Can't believe I just refered to suicidal thoughts has usual.

Freddy: I mean they are, everything he did has fucked him up so hard that's the usual.- the vocalist said before getting back to the bed- Lean forward.- the smaller obeyed, the other putting pillow bettwen the rabbit and the bedframe. T

Bonnie: Thanks rockstar...

Freddy: It's nothing... Try to rest now, we have to leave early in the morning.- he added before kissing the other's forehead.

Bonnie:Don't remind me...

I hope you enjoyed the chapter if so please comment your thoughts and vote.
Much love!!

-MissevilXD