Ever The Same

19

Derek didn't deserve this. That much he knew. He didn't deserve for Meredith to have just come with him. Izzie had brought her downstairs and she had gotten into the car with him just like nothing had happened. They were going to go home. Together. For the first night in nearly a week, they were going home together. After a silent ride home, and a few minutes of sitting in the car in front of their house, he finally got out and helped his wife, who he hadn't realized had gotten so frail, inside of the house.

"I don't need you to hold my hand." She whispered, stepping inside.

"Okay." He breathed, reluctantly letting go as he shut the door to the house.

"It might be hot in here...I was cold so I turned the heat on."

"Do you want me to turn it down or..."

"Yeah..." She whispered, walking into the living room and flipping a light on.

"Okay...I'll...turn it down." He nodded, adjusting the thermostat before turning around. "Do you um...I'll get you some water."

"No..." She whispered, crossing her arms across her chest sitting down on the arm chair.

"No." He repeated, standing in the same spot, watching her and noticing how sick she looked.

"I um...I haven't done any laundry."

"It's okay."

"Okay." She whispered.

"Do you want to...talk now or...wait until morning?" He breathed.

"I um...now...we should talk now." Meredith whispered, taking a deep breath.

"Okay." Derek sighed, sitting down on the sofa.

"Did you...I mean Izzie said you picked up your dry cleaning from the dry cleaners but...I went and they didn't have my sweater...."

"I have it...it's at the hotel..."

"Okay..."

"I don't want to stay there anymore." He whispered.

"You don't?" She looked up, tears sitting in her tired green eyes.

"I haven't slept...at all...I want to come home."

"I'm pregnant." She said, a small cry escaping her lips.

"What did you..." Derek said, looking up at his wife.

"I'm six weeks pregnant."

"So...I'm not..."

"No." She said, her voice shaking. "Dr. Samson called with the rest of my results...and he said sometimes it takes time but that I was pregnant then I took three tests..."

"You're pregnant." He whispered.

"I can't eat...I haven't slept and apparently our baby wants me to starve because he...she or he hates food."

"Oh god." Derek breathed, standing up and walking over to his wife, before wrapping his arms around her.

"Oh...."

"You're pregnant." He whispered, unable to keep himself from crying.

"Yeah..."

"I'm sorry...I'm sorry." He cried.

"Me too." She whispered, her body leaning into his.

"I'm so sorry."

"Me too." She breathed, her body feeling an instant desire to sleep as she leaned against him. "I'm sorry this...we stopped being us and I want us to be fixed."