Moments that define us

Chapter Twenty Eight

Jameson

It's been two weeks since I saw the woman I love het into a wreck, and saw my entire world flash in front of my eyes. That's a cliche thing to say, ain't it? But it's the truth. That girl is every bit of heaven that I could ever dream of havin', and the thought of losing her. That messed with me.

So I made two promises when she was asleep in that hospital bed. The first one. I was goin' to show her how much she meant to me. Do everything in my power to prove it. That's why I put my resume in with a local lineman company near where Emily lives. Deciding to move my entire life from Alabama to Kentucky. That was a hard decision. I didn't want to leave maw. But maw just laughed at me, and said my happiness was the greatest gift she could ask for, and as long as I visited every couple of months. She would let it slide.

What also made this decision hard was Beckham. I loved that little boy somethin' fierce. When I eventually came home from the hospital, Mandy was in a fit of rage. But did you see what happened next? I guess I should've seen it a mile away. While she was screamin' at me, she knocked her purse in the floor tryin' to get her keys out. When it fell, she also had pills fall out that weren't prescribed to her. She screamed at me even more. I truly did feel sorry for her. But more than that. I felt sorry for our son who had to witness it. She needed help. She was now at a rehabilitation center. She was due to stay in there for three months. Then she would gradually get to see Beckham again. So my son was movin' to Kentucky with me.

That second promise? Well that was to God. While I wouldn't change a thing about havin' a daughter with Emily, I realized while she was sleepin' in that hospital bed, that I done a lot of things wrong by her. I promised God that I would be the man he wanted me to be. Because Lord knows Emmalynn Rose deserves only the best kind of man.

I had talked to her daddy and momma about my plans. I knew she was havin' a house built on their land, so I decided to hire some extra helping hands. Discreetly. I didn't want her to realize too quickly that her house was comin' together so soon.

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A month after Emily got discharged from the hospital, Beckham and me packed all our bags and made the drive from Alabama to Kentucky. I got word that I got accepted for a position at a new job, and we were off to start our new adventure.

You see I was determined to prove to this heaven sent girl that I loved her. So I did the the next thing on my list. I took Beckham to a local jewelry store, and let my son help me pick out a ring for Emily.

He was so excited to be apart of everything. I could really tell since Mandy went to rehab that he had been lacking so much genuine love. He soaked every bit he could get up like a sponge.

It was now a Sunday and Beckham and I got ready for church. Emily had no clue I was back in town, and I'm sure she was goin' to be surprised. Maybe a little bit mad too. But I was nothin' if not determined.

"You ready to go?"I hollered at my son.

He walked out of the bathroom. Kid has his wranglers on, a pearl-snapped shirt, and even had a buckle of his own, that I bought at a local boot store. I couldn't wait to teach him the ins and outs of ridin'.

"Yes sir." He answered. Then went to get his boots on.

We hopped in my truck and took off towards the church. When we got there, we got out, and walked in. My palms were startin' to sweat, and the collar of my button-up shirt felt too tight.

Standing in the middle of the room, dressed in a long white lace dress was Emily. Could you hear that? How my heart was beating faster. The sight of her in white did things to my insides, and like a reel of tape, my mind played her walkin' towards me on our wedding day. I just had to get this girl to say yes.

"Well aren't y'all a sight for sore eyes." Alma leaned over and hugged me, then got down on Beckhams level to talk to him. She held out some candy for him, and like an eager pup, he grabbed them as quick as he could. She stood up, and looked over at me again. "She's glowin'." She said it barely above a whisper.

I glanced over at that angel in white, and found it hard to breathe. Especially with that ring weighing down my pocket. "She is." I replied. My voice was raspy to my own ears. I couldn't keep my eyes off that angel in the center of the room.

She was capturing everyone's attention. But she must've heard my voice. You see, at that exact moment, Emily looked over at me. The air was charged. Like two magnets being pulled together, but yet they couldn't get to each other for everything in the way.

Alma touched my arm, and I begrudgingly took my eyes off Emily to look at her momma. "Why don't we take our seats. Church is fixin' to start."

I grabbed Beckham by the hand and lead him to a pew. We were sittin' by Alma, when Roger made his way over to shake my hand. "It's good to see ya Jameson." His voice was strong. Even though he liked me now, he didn't like how I had hurt his daughter.  I didn't blame him. I would beat myself up everyday for walkin' away from that girl.

"Hi, cutie pie. What might your name be?" Is it possible for all the air to leave your body, and just be left with a thrashin' heart. Because hearin' that sweet voice, that's how I felt. My hands were trembling, and I don't think I had ever felt more nervous in my life.

"My name is Beckham, ma'am." My son responded to Emily, even though his name sounded more like 'Becca' outta his mouth. Then kids bein' kids, he continued. "Are you my new momma? My daddy looks at your picture all the time. He even let me pick out a ring." I know all that sounded a little like gibberish with his speech not being the best since he wasn't two yet, but she understood it didn't she? I think she feels the way I did hearin' her voice.

Emily's gaze flickers from Beckham to me, and her mouth moves like a fish out of water. She finally gets a hold of herself. "It's nice to meet you Beckham." Her gaze comes back to me, and those beautiful green eyes narrow at me. "Although you must have me confused sweetheart. Did your daddy get your momma a ring?"

I  almost choke on air hearin' her say that. But I don't blame her for thinkin' that way. Beckham though. He doesn't miss a beat. "My momma is sick. She went to the doctor to get better." He reaches over and touches her swollen belly, and smiles widely at her. "Daddy says I'm gonna have a sister."

Emily looks at his little hand touching her pregnant stomach, and gently she places her hand over his. "You're daddy told you that?" She sounds bewildered. Do you see those tears brimmin' her eyes?

Beckham looks up at Emily's face and smiles at her again. "He said my sister and momma were the most prettiest angels."

One of those tears fall. Gently cascading down her flushed cheek. "Angels huh?" That's directed at me.

I reach over to wipe her lone tear away. "The most beautiful." I tell her.

She sits down by Beckham, since the service is fixin' to start. You know they say God works in mysterious ways. I have to say. I think I agree. I found the love of my life in the middle of a storm. I also almost lost two of the best things in my life due to a storm.

That service the preacher talks about the storms we weather, and how they are used to draw us closer to Jesus, instead of farther away. That day at altar call, as a single tear falls down my face. I make my way to the altar and give my life to the Lord.

I didn't know God's plans for that day. I only knew my own. What I had planned was for after that service. What God had planned was during that service. When I got up from prayin', and looked over. Emily was standin' right beside me with tears in her eyes.

She leaned into me, and hugged me. I pulled her into me as tight as I could without hurtin' her, or our baby. "I love you so much Jameson." She was hard to understand through all of her cryin'. "I'm so proud of you."

I gently kissed her forehead, and held her for a few more minutes. It's crazy though, when you think about it. The moments that define us. They are the simple ones. They are the big ones. They are all the ones in between. So even though I have regrets, I know I'm the man I am, because of the moments that lead me here.