There, crouching inside a broken cage b4 them, was a full fucking dude
Wtf
That is so cringe
Then he said, "Uh... could you help or...?"
Penelope and Esme r quaking.
"Did u eat remus lupins peas??!?", yelped p and e simultaneously
"Uh... I guess so??"
"DID U EAT THE TORTOISE 2?!?!?"
"No, I am the tortoise, just help me out and I'll explain."
They pry him out of the cage
This took a while...
"Thank you. OK so I owe you an explanation..."
"Yes tf u do", says esme
"So first, my name is remus lupin, but--"
"Like my tortoise, whattttttttt?!?!?!?", exclaimed esme.
"I am your tortoise. I am in PRANK WARS WITH SNAPE (TM) and he turned me into a tortoise."
"Who's snape, brah?", questioned penelope.
"That doesn't matter right now, I don't have enough time. I'll turn back into a tortoise after the new moon."
"Yeah man that's craaaaaaazy," says penelope.
"Look, magic exists. You're witches, I'm a wizard, and I need you to help me get back to Hogwarts--"
"Ewwwwwwww", they say in unison
"--it's a magic school, Snape works there but you can't talk to him. Take me to Professor Flitwick, he'll know what to do. Will you do it, will you help me?"
"Kk" They respond
Remus looks out the window, and sees that it's becoming brighter.
"Take the District line to Monument, and then you can walk to rest of the way to Leadenhall Market to get to Diagon Alley. From there, take the floo network to Hogwarts--"
"--and then we find Flitwick?", e and p say together
"Yes. And the Curse needs to be broken before the full moon because I'm a we--"
There is a loud POP and he turns back into a tortoise, screaming.
YOU ARE READING
I have a pet turtle (and his name is Remus Lupin)
Fanfictwo kiddies who want nothing more than to not do their geography coursework go on a journey of a lifetime when a dude says he needs help. When other randos keep talking to them, will they ever get back to geography? Craig is too powerful, the huffl...
